Over our blessedly long holiday break (one of the best things about working at D Magazine), I got to check out a new place not far from my neighborhood, White Rock Alehouse. You know where that huge Tejano bar used to be, near the spillway? No? The old YMCA that moved up Gaston? No? The Goat? Ah! It’s right across the street from the Goat. I went to watch the Rose Bowl game there. (Sorry, Sooners.) Here are my mostly un-food-related thoughts on the place.
Above all, it’s a good addition to East Dallas. I’ll return. I ran into three people I know. The plentiful and large TVs make it nearly a sports bar. The beer selection is better than solid, with everything displayed on DigitalTap screens. I sat at the bar. Service there was attentive and helpful. An appetizer of crab-stuffed tots went into my mouth with frightful ease.
However. Yes. But. The ceiling is high enough that you could fly a drone in the place. And nearly every surface is a hard one (glass, concrete, etc.), such that when the place is full, as it was for the Rose Bowl, it is very loud. At the bar, I sat to the left of my buddy. Two people we knew showed up and sat to our right. I had a hard time hearing those two people. And, yes, I am old. Too many people making too much fun-noise — I really shouldn’t complain. In fact, I’m not complaining. I’m just, as they say, saying.
OK, but here’s the thing that I do want to complain about. It’s the White Rock Alehouse’s slogan. That slogan is the following: “Life is brewtiful.”
WRA has a pretty good little logo. It depicts the Dallas skyline in the distance and a sailboat on the lake in the foreground. I remarked to my buddy that I’d buy one of their shirts if it had that logo on it, and not the WR/AB thing they’ve got on the shirts now (see the website). He said, “Yeah, and if it didn’t say, ‘Life is brewtiful’ on it. There’s something Applebee’s about that pun. Too much flair.”
Listen. Puns are dangerous. Brett Shipp taught us that, if nothing else. A little pun goes a long way. You put “Life is brewtiful” on the bottom of your menu? That’s cute. I smile. You put “Life is brewtiful” on your t-shirts? I’m not buying a shirt. You paint “Life is brewtiful” on a wall on your patio, in letters that are 3 feet tall and you make “Life is brewtiful” your pun-driven aesthetic? Well, now I’m not sure about your entire enterprise.
Point size, I guess is what I’m saying. Puns should never exceed 8-point type. On occasion, maybe 12. Never in Comic Sans, it goes without saying.
So I’m still not sure about you, WRA. I’ll be back. But as I come through the door, I’ll be giving you side-eye.
