SMU professor Robin Pinkley, founder of the M2M (Master to Master) Center for Profitable Negotiation, swore she’d never do gender research, believing it would just perpetuate biases instead of alleviate them. Four years ago, though, she “just couldn’t take it anymore,” and delved into the topic. The result is a research report called “Gender and the Assertion Myth in Gender and Leadership.”
What Pinkley found was revealing. “As much as I hate it, it can’t be denied, that, on average, women have a tendency to negotiate less often and less assertively than men,” she says. “However, that does not suggest that women are not as effective negotiators as men.”
The issue, says Pinkley, is confidence. Women have no problem negotiating on behalf of others, but shy away from doing so on their own behalf. The lack of confidence comes across as a competence issue—when that’s not the case. “The correlation is zero,” Pinkley says. Women also fear backlash from being assertive. But there’s a big difference between being assertive, which is looked upon favorably, and being aggressive, which is not, Pinkley says.
When negotiating compensation packages, she offers three key strategies—for both women and men:
- Don’t be afraid to ask. Have confidence in who you are and what you bring to the table.
- Do it with a purpose. Know what you’re asking for. Do your homework before every interview and every negotiation.
- Ask for a number, not a range. It will very much inform where you end up. Don’t wait for an offer. State the number first, then follow with an explanation of why.
