Are you obsessed with the State Fair of Texas Big Tex Choice Awards, like I am? Good, so you have your season pass to the fair already, you’ve blacked out and will avoid at all costs the days that are free-tickets-for-public-schools and TX/OU days (read: the End Of Days days), you mouth-kiss that mural of Big Tex every time you go to Taco Joint, you’ve planned out your parking strategy, and you’re going to hit all the new items in one furious flurry of fried regret and devastation?
Well, if you’re like me, and you get a rush from daring your insides to explode by eating every one of the Big Tex Choice Awards foods, hear this: You don’t have to wait until the fair opens to eat these new fried foods (and one non-fried item that somehow got past security).
The 12th Annual Big Tex Choice Awards are on Sunday, August 28th. And the State Fair of Texas has decided to sell tickets to the public to this final judging day, when they’ll have celebrity judges choose a winner for Best Tasting and Most Creative. For the low, low price of $100 per ticket, you’ll even get to taste each and every finalist food. That means when someone at work goes, “Fried Jell-O sounds nasty,” you can be all, “Shut up, Chauncifer. It’s actually quite good.” or “Yeah, when I tasted it before the rest of the public had access to it (because I’m special like that), I was like, ‘This is not my favorite.’ Your instincts are absolutely right, Jernathon.”
Here is where you buy tickets.
Here is your prestigious panel of fried judges:
Don Gay – 8-Time PRCA World Champion Bull Rider and Commentator
He’s a multi-medal-ed bull rider. Judging fried food. I’m sure it makes sense. Serving as a judge in this year’s competition, Don Gay is a world champion bull rider and commentator. An original inductee into the Pro Rodeo Hall of Fame in 1979, Don was joined by his father Neal in 1993, making them the only father-son team in the rodeo shrine. Don retired from bull riding in 1989 and has served as a TV color analyst for GAC, ESPN, TNN, FSN, OTDCH, and RFD.
Eddie Jackson – The Next Food Network Star, Season 11 Winner
Hey! A Food Network person! Who has a food truck named Caribbean Grill. That Caribbean Pineapple Korn-A-Kopia finalist will either find a friend or fried foe with this guy.
Mai Lyn Ngo – Deep Fried Fit
A food and fitness blogger makes the judges panel this year. Hopefully she will do fried chicken pot pie squats and dead lift some cookie fries whilst judging. Mai Lyn Ngo founded Deep Fried Fit to share her unconditional love of both food and fitness, while promoting a balanced lifestyle fueled by green juice and fried chicken.
Kent Rathbun – Renowned Chef and Restaurateur
Wait– a chef? Judging a food competition? Get out of here. OMG we should fry his black Porsche 911 Carrera S with vanity plates that read “CHEFY” while he judges, y’all. It’ll be hilarious. And it’ll win for Most Creative after he Godzillas the whole fair looking for the turds who used tempura instead of waffle batter to fry his favorite car. “CLEARLY THIS CAR IS SWEET AND NOT SAVORY! WHAT ON EARTH HAVE YOU DONE???”
Dan O’Malley – 97.1 The Eagle, On-Air Personality and News Director for The Russ Martin Show
Next on the judging panel is Dan O’Malley, the cohost and news director of The Russ Martin Show from 3 to 7 p.m. on KEGL-FM 97.1 The Eagle. Please tell me Dan O’Malley will bring a mix tape including the entire works of Green Day that the competitors can fry. Fried Billie Joe Armstrong tastes of eyeliner and emotion.
Tiffinni A. Young – Dallas City Councilwoman, District 7
Tiffinni A. Young is returning to the panel this year. Deep-fried Humann on a stick, anyone?
Tickets to the event are $100, with all proceeds going to the State Fair of Texas Youth Scholarship Program. Each ticket includes one admission ticket to the State Fair, a Fair-branded baseball cap and a commemorative Big Tex refillable cup. Oh hell yeah, I need that refillable cup.
