The big question, obviously, is why are we having an unhurried lunch in Texarkana, at a Mexican joint called Ta Molly’s, talking about The Muppet Movie, drawing suspicious looks from Texarkansans, waiting for a guy named Dan to come take away our 2015 Escalade, one of the finest automobiles ever made? The smaller, though no less relevant, question is: have you ever barreled down an interstate at 80 mph, cradled by a leather chair that blows cool air across your buttocks, letting adaptive cruise control essentially drive your car for you? I highly recommend the 2015 Cadillac Escalade — as soon as they fix the passenger-side airbag, the recall for which occasioned our stop in Texarkana, where the aforementioned Dan is rushing to meet us in a replacement automobile, a Yukon XL, year of manufacture unknown. I’m sure the Yukon will suit our needs. But will it chill our bottoms? Questions. Right now, at Ta Molly’s, that’s all we have.
