Monday, May 6, 2024 May 6, 2024
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Local News

THE FORT, THE HOLDING THEREOF

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Santa is safely back home, probably chillin’ in a Sharper Image massage chair, recouperating from another great Christmas. All the little elves from D and People Newspapers are also home, taking a well-deserved week off. Meanwhile, notes from the dark office:
– It is 4:25 p.m. on Christmas Eve. I am standing near the exit door of Best Buy on Central Expressway while my wife buys a last-minute Christmas present for me. The absurdity of this situation is delicious, and it puts me in a very happy/silly holiday mood. Thinking that things can’t get much better, I turn to see a giant man in chinos and D-logo baseball cap loping toward me, his giggling daughter in tow. It is the Emperor himself, Sir Lodowick of Allison, racing down the DVD aisle. Yes, the man who is always in control is very much out of control, trying to buy presents for the five very sophisticated women in his household in one afternoon. “Uh, hi, got what we need…been to Neiman’s…two more stops…where’s the…” His voice trails off as he marches out the door. Allisonette #4 gives a wink of her impossibly big brown eyes.
– Against all odds, our Cowboys pull out a miracle win in Carolina, restoring hopes for a playoff berth. Even the most wizened sports hacks scratch their heads over the multiple personalities exhibited by their beloved ‘Boys. We never know who will show up, but they are at 9-6 (a reversal of last year’s 6-9 at this point).
– Christmas morning in Dallas: 68 degrees, bright sunshine. Paradise!
– Dallas ends the year dry as a bone, more than 15 inches less than our average annual rainfall, the fifth driest year on record.
– The Mavs and Stars are ON FIRE, both leading their divisions
– D’s “Best & Worst” issue is out on newsstands. A real snarkfest you are sure to enjoy.

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