The big soccer news, of course, is that we didn’t get the World Cup Final. But lost in the harrumphing is the fact that AT&T Stadium has to change its name for the nine matches we did land. FIFA has a rule that host stadiums can’t bear corporate names. So the Death Star for the duration of the tournament will be called “Dallas Stadium.”
Think on that for a moment. You’re Arlington. You are overflowing with “classic Arlington toughness.” The world’s biggest sporting event is coming to your town. Time to shine! Except then you learn that AT&T Stadium, the thing for which you paid $325 million, can’t be called AT&T Stadium.
“No problem. We’ll just call it Arlington Stadium.”
“No. Gianni Infantino has never heard of Arlington. Doesn’t like it.”
“OK, how about Estadio Gerardo?”
“We don’t get the joke.”
“Stadium McStadiumface?”
“We’re gonna go with Dallas Stadium. Everyone has heard of Dallas.”
“But …”
We’re sorry, Arlington. We know this really sucks. But there are some other changes being made so there’s no confusion when international visitors come to town. It’s now called “Six Flags Over Dallas.” We think “Dallas Live!” has a better ring to it. And “UT Dallas, Also” just makes sense.
Thank you for your patience and understanding.
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