Friday, May 24, 2024 May 24, 2024
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One Middle-Aged Man’s Take on Kyrie’s New Sneaker

The ANTA KAI 1 will drop today at Sneaker Politics, in Deep Ellum.
Kyrie photo by Trevor Ruszkowski-USA TODAY Sports

When I rode through Deep Ellum on the way to work this morning, folks were already queued up on the sidewalk in front of Sneaker Politics to be one of the first to buy Kyrie Irving’s new sneaker at a special launch event. A block party with DJs will start at 6.

I don’t know who is writing news stories at CW 33, but here’s what they say about the sneaker: “The ANTA KAI 1 ‘Artist On Court’ embodies every facet of Kyrie’s game, from his strength and agility to his laser focus and lightning speed. Each design detail tells a story, allowing you to channel Kyrie’s signature style and performance as you take the court.”

Uh huh. If you say so.

Here is my assessment: THIS MAVERICKS TEAM SUCKS! We’ve got two ball-dominant superstars who are running an offense that a decent eighth-grade team could figure out how to defend. Kyrie’s defense is awful. Josh Green is not the answer. Timmy Hardaway Jr. has forgotten how to shoot. Luka too often mopes around the court when things don’t go his way, to the point that last night against the Pacers, a loose ball almost hit him in the head because he’d stopped playing and was walking around with his hands in his pockets, kicking sand, and muttering Slovenian curse words. Frickin Patrick Dumont needs to put on his fancy governor loafers and catch a flight from Vegas to Dallas to fire Jason Kidd pronto. We need an actual coach in here who has the stones to tell Luka, “Yes, you’re the best player on the court. But I need you to grow up.” Mike Budenholzer. Right now. Hire him. He’s probably at home doing nothing but making funny faces at the TV.

But maybe that’s just me. I acknowledge I’m not the target market for these sneakers.


Tim Rogers

Tim Rogers

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Tim is the editor of D Magazine, where he has worked since 2001. He won a National Magazine Award in…