Woke up this morning, opened the front door, and found an opossumÂ dead. IÂ put on my Varmint Gloves, held my breath,Â double baggedÂ the corpseÂ and put it on the curb. Then, I called 3-1-1 and told the City of Dallas to pick it up. Twenty minutes later, a city guy calls my cell phone, asks me what’s in the bag (I tell him) and next thing I know, the carcass is gone. Moral of the story: If you want something disappeared, call 3-1-1. I’m not sure if this works in all cases (the removal of in-laws, annoying supervisors and rich widows might require more planning). The opossumÂ aboveÂ isn’t the same as the one that was bumped off. You wouldn’t have wanted to see how that fellow looked, believe me.