I was a senior at SMU in 1989 when the June Jones-led Houston college football concern defeated SMU and its 14 starting freshmen, 95-21, accumulating more than 1000 yards of offense. I hated June Jones that day. As did SMU coach Forrest Gregg. Hated him for many years after, too, because he kept throwing deep against a clearly inferior opponent. (I can hold a grudge.) And I rejoiced when, three years later, Houston visited Michigan, a team that never runs up the score, and the Wolverines were throwing deep into the last minutes of their 61-7 victory. After the game, Michigan coach Gary Moeller secured a cushy place in my dark heart by saying, “That was for the SMUs and Eastern Washingtons of the world.” Now, June Jones is the new football coach at SMU. I’m not saying I won’t root for the Ponies. I’m not saying I don’t wish the team well. I’m not saying I can’t let bygones be bygones. I’m. Just. Saying.
The funny thing is, before I read the comments and was, eh, REMINDED that it was John Jenkins, not June Jones, I was really, really proud of this post. [gunshot]
UPDATE: I mean, do you know how long it took me to find the photo that I linked to, the one that is supposed to look like me circa 1989? And how much it kinda DOES look like me then? I’m having a real identity crisis here, people, and we’re one week into the new year. [Reload, double gunshot]