I can finally say that I’ve accomplished 12 of the Things Every Dallasite Must Do. My latest opponent was a brick planter outside of Neiman Marcus at NorthPark Center, which doubles as a slide for kids. And, now, for D Magazine interns too.
Here’s what you need to know if you too have never participated in this rite of passage:
First, and most obviously, if you are over 4 feet tall, accomplishing this feat will be a challenge.
Secondly, you must leave your pride at home, at the office, in your car, or wherever you keep it, because this is not a very flattering undertaking.
Third, there was a mall cop watching me the entire time, and he just laughed. No worries about getting reprimanded.
Fourth, be ready to have a good time. Sliding down the planter was the most fun I’ve had in a while. (You may think, “That girl needs to get out more,” but no – it was just that enjoyable.) There was something about sliding down the planter, and throwing my pride, worry, and stress far, far away, (while inviting embarrassment) that really got to me. It reminded me of the good ol’ days of Chuck E. Cheese and DZ Discovery Zone, except that I didn’t have to crawl through plastic tunnels to get to this slide.
My main difficulty was finding the correct technique. I thought being in socks for an extra slip factor would be a good idea, but it turns out that wearing shoes with some traction helps keep you at the top until you’re ready to slide down. Unlike the nimble ninja kids I’ve seen do this before, I was unable to run up the side of the planter before sweeping back to the bottom. I had to sort of squat at the top first.
After you try this yourself, please share your technique with the rest of us so that others may be more graceful looking when they indulge their inner child.
Katie Minchew is a D Magazine intern.