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Restaurant Reviews

Taste Test Thursday: Greek Yogurt

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greek_yogurt_taste_test
Yogurt, yogurt, yogurt. (photography by Carol Shih)

There are some fads I will never understand, and Greek yogurt is one of them.

(I guess I’ve never been much of a yogurt person, anyway, unless you tell me you’re making a mango lassi with it.)

But who am I to judge? Greek yogurt is good, sure. It’s swallow-able if you mix in honey, fruit, and granola. It’s great with a cup of earl grey tea in the morning. Greek yogurt is a leisurely snack. Creamy, tart, and healthy as healthy can be. Everyone has their favorite brand.

Interested to find out how yours fared in our taste test? I’ll give you a hint. There’s a reason why Hamdi Ulukaya is a freaking billionaire.

greekyogurt

A. Chobani’s 0% plain, non-fat yogurt
B. Trader Joe’s organic Greek-style, plain, 0% milkfat yogurt
C. Fage’s total 0% Greek-strained yogurt
D. Green Mountain Creamery’s 0% fat Greek plain yogurt

2_taste_testers

A hodgepodge of random people who gagged at the yogurt. (Yogurt that does not come in yogurt cups is a little jiggly wiggly looking.)

AChobani1

3_tasting_notes

 

  • “Salty, I like it.”
  • “Neutral, but watery.”
  • “A bit sour.”
  • “Creamy, nice balance of tart and sweet, full flavor”
  • “Sweet, but doesn’t bother me.”

 

Btraderjoes

3_tasting_notes

 

  • “Pungent aftertaste.”
  • “Sour. Yikes. Ew.”
  • “Terrible, too sour, and not thick enough.”
  • “Too tart.”
  • “Slightly sweet, yeasty/fermenty aftertaste.”

 

Cfage

3_tasting_notes

 

  • “Nice and creamy, but watery.”
  • “Like how thick it is.”
  • “Nice texture, creamy, tart, but not too tart.”
  • “Thick texture, rich.”
  • “Creamy, hint of lemon.”

 

Dgreenmountain

3_tasting_notes

 

  • “Dry, tart.”
  • “A bit watery on initial side. A bit sour.”
  • “Thick, smooth.”
  • “Perfect consistency.”
  • “A little watery, but good.”

 

4_tally_up

3 votes for (A) Chobani
3 votes for (C) Fage
1 vote for (D) Green Mountain

5_conclusion

When you pour Greek yogurt out of its cup, it becomes unappetizing in two seconds flat. Trembling and watery and runny, the yogurt looks like the super opaque version of lard. Yummy, huh?

It actually took a bit of convincing to get our taste testers to get over their initial disgust.

Chobani was the most watery looking, but its taste made up for the melting factor. No wonder Chobani is one of the best-selling yogurt brands in the United States. I guess people don’t mind runny Greek yogurt, since it’s kinda like eating regular yogurt, anyway. Fage was the total opposite, but it tied with Chobani. It was the thickest of the four Greek yogurts. Very little water. Super creamy. You should buy this brand if you like your yogurt ‘staches.

Trader Joe’s yogurt was way too sour. Almost everyone who tried it made this ugly, puckered-up face. Don’t buy this brand of Greek yogurt if you can help it. Just don’t. Personally, Fage is where I’d put my money.

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