Parkland Hospital Releases Major Presby Diss Track
Today, Parkland released a video showing how to properly don and doff protective gear when caring for a patient who has (or is suspected to have) the Ebola virus. “As a public safety net hospital, we believe it is our responsibility to care for anyone who presents at our doors. Part of that mission is to share with others in the health care industry our knowledge of best practices,” said Alex Eastman, Parkland’s Disaster Medical Director. Definitely feels like a subtweet aimed squarely at Parkland's well-heeled, previously-well-thought-of competitor Presbyterian Hospital, which apparently could use a brush up on best practices in this regard. Or, if you prefer, their version of Nas' "Ether," directed toward the former "Neiman Marcus of hospitals." Maybe Presby has a "Takeover" in them. UPDATE FROM TIM ROGERS (9:35 PM) I had a conversation this evening with a senior Parkland official who was really unhappy with the above post. He didn't know what a diss track is or who Nas is or what "Takeover" sounds like. Honestly, neither did I when I read this post. Still don't. But I got the gist. I thought it was clever. And I never for a second thought Zac really meant that Parkland was trying to diss Presby. He was just making a joke. The Parkland official's point was that this is not a subject to joke about. It's not funny. One person in Dallas has died. Others are sick. People are working hard to save lives. Hospitals are not competing with each other or dissing each other. I told him that I understood his point and that I thought it could lead to a really interesting, worthwhile conversation. Here's the deal: I've been making Ebola jokes for a couple weeks. A coworker told me she had diarrhea. My first response: Ebola joke. My out-of-state friends are texting and emailing me Ebola jokes, saying they won't see me at Thanksgiving unless I put myself in quarantine right now. Stuff like that. I think this sort of joking is a normal, natural, healthy human response. It's a relief valve on a system that's under a lot of pressure. But you know what? I'm not a healthcare worker. I'm a civilian out here in the world, living under different conditions than hospital officials are experiencing right now. Our relief valve might come across like a guy running through a tense business meeting while firing off an air horn. Or, you know, a better analogy. It's late. Been a long day. It ended, for me, with two insane meetings on my children's behalf (behalves?) at two different schools, followed by a lengthy conversation with a Parkland official, during which I'm afraid I raised my voice more than I ought to have. For that, I apologize to the Parkland official. As for this post, it'll remain up, and hopefully we'll all learn from it. UPDATE (9:56 PM) From the Parkland official: "I am aware of what a diss track is. And I am very familiar with Nas, as Illmatic came out when I was in college and is one of the most important hip hop albums of all time. I am actually probably more familiar with Nas than the guy who wrote this article. So that part is inaccurate."
By Zac Crain