This Just In! Revolutionary Device Takes Years Off Your Skin!

Just when you think you’ve seen and heard it all, a press release like this lands in your mailbox. These are the (alleged) hands of a woman in Maryland who has a Geowave, or My Personal Optimizer, installed in her home. Twelve years ago, this “life-enhancing product” was believed to produce a calming and relaxing feeling, as well as improved healing, in a group of patients at a university hospital in Europe. Now hundreds of Geowaves are hanging in hospitals throughout Europe, and this amazing “interior design element” is now available in the U.S. It hangs from the ceiling and removes stress and tension from the environment and the body. On the web site are comments from doctors and scientists, but here’s the official word from the “studies”: “The device had a harmonizing effect on the human body, and biochemical parameters collected from saliva samples showed increased IgA (a sign of lower stress and relaxation). With less stress and tension, the body is able to sleep deeper and rest better. When we sleep better, our body produces more melatonin, and many doctors consider melatonin to be a promising anti-aging therapy. In addition, “My Personal Optimizer” increases the human energy field and gives people more usable energy.” The Maryland woman’s younger-looking hands are just a bonus! And to think–all this time I had only a ceiling fan in my home. Silly me.

P.S. This thing will set you back at least a grand (or $2,000 for the top-of-the-line model.) But it has a six-month guarantee, so …

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