I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately. We’ve never officially met, but I’ve heard lots of good things about you. To be perfectly honest, the reason I’ve been so shy is because I’m a little afraid of you. I know, I know, it’s silly—the FDA says you’re safe. But, ya know, there’s that whole needle thing. Anyway, I’m writing today because I thought I was finally ready to make your acquaintance. The past several decades have started to do a number on my forehead, and I figured you could help. But then I heard about something called NoTox. It’s also called Relaxed Expressions, and you can get it at this place in Plano. I don’t know much about it, but you can read more here. The results are immediate, and it’s supposed to last up to two years! That’s impressive, no? I’m still thinking about you, Botox; I just wanted you to know that there was someone else, too. No matter what happens, I hope we can at least be friends. TTYL!