photography courtesy of NBC Channel 5 Mike Snyder

Anchor Away

D calls the odds on Mike Snyder’s replacement.

Word around the media campfire is that NBC Channel 5 10 PM anchor Mike Snyder was only offered a six-month contract extension earlier this summer. That means the clock is ticking on one of our favorite pastimes: blindly speculating as to who will replace Snyder at the news desk alongside Jane McGarry. Here’s the shortlist. John McCaa (5-1)
Getting McCaa to come over from Channel 8 would be a coup, since it weakens one of Channel 5’s main competitors while strengthening its own newscast. McCaa might be interested since it means he would no longer have to listen to his co-anchor over-pronounce her surname. Unless, of course, McGarry starts affecting a Scottish brogue.

Brendan Higgins photography courtesy of NBC Channel 5
Brendan Higgins (3-1)
Higgins had a successful stint subbing for Snyder in June and is already in the building, so he has a leg up on his competition. Other plusses: he looks dashing with his prematurely silver hair and McGarry no doubt hates him much less than she hates Snyder. Big minus: he wears MBTs.

Eric Celeste (13-1)
Now that he’s worked for every print media company in town, it makes sense that the peripatetic D Magazine managing editor (for now) would move on to TV, since there is literally nowhere else left to go. Pros: more movie quotes on every newscast; amazing overlaughs during crosstalk with Newy. Cons: big, shiny bald head; tendency to do crunches at inappropriate times.

Jessica Simpson (20-1)
Let’s face it: this is her manifest destiny. She’s good on TV but not good at anything that usually gets you on TV, has gigantic hair, huge white teeth, and we’re fairly certain she can read. Come on, Channel 5. Make it happen.

Gordon Keith photography courtesy of Gordon Keith
Gordon Keith (7-1)
If Channel 5 is looking to inject some levity into its usual “What everyday household product might KILL YOU … tonight at 10” broadcasts, the Preston Hollow-based king of all (local) media would be an interesting choice. Plus, he and McGarry have matching hair helmets.

Megan Henderson photography courtesy of Fox 4
Megan Henderson (8-1)
Not only is Henderson a solid co-anchor of Fox’s Good Day morning show, she is smoking hot, which never hurts. She’s probably headed for bigger and better, though.