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A media-shy radio guy, a girl to make you Blue, The List, political bookends, smelly stinkbait, Dallas the movie, and more.
By D Magazine |




Hymen’s in da House!

Media-shy Hymen Childs owns the number one black radio station in town. Oh, and he’s white and Jewish.

BACK IN MAY, WHEN THE CONTROVERSIAL scheme to sell off the frequency of the city-owned radio station fizzled out, a most unusual thing happened: Hymen Childs apparently gave an interview. Childs was neither photographed nor quoted directly, but Jim Schutze wrote in the Dallas Observer that he had spoken with him and that, even more shockingly, Childs had commented on the proposed radio deal. We’ll just have to take Schutze at his word.

For those who haven’t kept up, the City of Dallas is broke. To make some money, it had entertained a three-way frequency swap among Childs’ 105.7 (KRNB), the city’s classical 101.1 (WRR), and 93.3 (KDBN, “The Bone”). The deal would have netted the city $60 million. Lots of call letters and numbers. Very complicated. The upshot, though, was that the City Council wasn’t sure $60 million was a fair price, and, what’s more, the whole thing devolved into a racial issue, because WRR’s new, weaker signal wouldn’t have reached South Dallas, thereby depriving black people of classical music. The deal died.

But Hymen Childs must have wanted it to happen. Badly. Because he talked to a reporter—again, assuming we can trust Schutze. In the 20 years that Childs has owned and operated Service Broadcasting—which includes K104, the number one station in town; KRNB; and KKDA-AM—he has left the tiniest of media footprints. A mention here and there. But no interviews. No photographs. Not even for this publication, which counts on its staff a senior editor who dated one of Childs’ daughters in high school.

Chris Arnold has worked for Childs for 23 years and does sports for K104’s number-one morning show, Skip Murphy and Company. “He’s a great guy, a very savvy guy, but very, very private,” he says. “Whenever we talk about sports, he always tells me that sports owners should stay in the background.”

Childs was inducted into the Texas Radio Hall of Fame last year. The ceremony was held in Forth Worth, but he didn’t attend. However, according to a short biography of Childs that was read aloud:

Childs was born in Austin and graduated from the University of Texas. After college, he told his father that he was going into the radio business rather than work at the family’s shoe store. His father, a Russian immigrant, wasn’t pleased. Nonetheless Childs sold air in Houston and then moved to Dallas in the mid-’60s, where he enjoyed success at a country-and-western station and eventually invested every cent he had to buy 730 AM. By 1976, he gained the FM license for the old KIXL FM, and, through “shrewd maneuvering,” Childs ended up with 104.5.

That makes Childs more than just unique. On a national radio dial that is dominated by conglomerates like Clear Channel Communications, which owns more than 1,200 stations, Childs is one of a small handful of independent operators with a top-rated station in a major market. That station happens to play an urban format, mostly aimed at black people. And Childs just happens to be white. And Jewish.

“Hymen is a rare breed,” says Peter Handy, owner of Dallas-based Star Media Group, an investment banking and radio brokerage firm. “There might be half a dozen Hymens left in the country, guys who own and operate their own very successful stations in high-profile markets.”

And Handy says Childs, who is 65, isn’t interested in selling. “I’ve floated some numbers in front of Hymen that are staggering,” he says, refusing to get more specific than something well north of $100 million. “Hymen has said to me on many occasions, ’What would I do that’s any more fun or rewarding, even if I had a pot-load of money, than what I do every day here?’ You can’t have a better answer than that.”

People who’ve worked for him describe Childs as a lovable and eccentric boss. He likes to give people nicknames and say things like “Hey, Hollywood, you’re the man!” A former employee says he’s like Isaac from The Love Boat, only whiter and more profane.

One reason his employees are so loyal and why many of them have worked for Childs for 10, 20 years, is because he pays them handsomely. The broadcast studio might be rundown, but the Cadillacs and Lexi parked in front are brand new. Childs himself prefers to drive older model, more modest cars. He only recently moved from a modest four-bedroom house off Royal to larger digs near Bent Tree Country Club.

“He could dramatically increase his lifestyle by selling that company, but for what?” says Handy. “If you’re a guy who wants to have a G5 and a place in the South of France, then you’d rather have the money. That’s not what Hymen wants. Hymen likes who Hymen is.” —Tim Rogers


A Dallas Producer Gives Showtime a Randy Cartoon Free For All

AFTER PRODUCING SUCH SUCCESSFUL teen movies as She’s All That and On the Line, Dallas native and Jesuit graduate Richard Hull decided it was time to grow up. So he made his next project a cartoon. “I love teen movies, but I thought it was time for me to grow into something that didn’t involve storylines for teenage girls,” Hull says from his editing room in Hollywood.

Hull’s maturity can be seen in Showtime’s animated series, Free For All, which premieres July 11 and is based on the comic strip of the same name. The show revolves around the misadventures of Clay, who won millions in a frivolous lawsuit against “Taco Hell” and Johnny, who lives at home with his homicidal grandmother and alcoholic pet ferret. The series features the voices of Juliette Lewis, Jonathan Silverman, Mitzi McCall, and Sam McMurray.

“The content of the show is a little edgier than the stuff I’ve been doing,” 33-year-old Hull says. “We’re trying to reach an audience that is more heavily male, so the tone of the humor is a little more boy. We use a lot of gross-out humor, like burping and farting. But we also do stuff that pushes the envelope, like political and pop-culture humor.”

Free For All airs every Friday at 10 p.m. on Showtime. —Taryn Maxwell

HOLLYWOOD NEWS ITEM!

Charlie’s Angels is a franchise hit, and Starsky & Hutch looks promising, too. Why not Dallas the movie? The original creator of the popular TV series, David Jacob, thought just that and has been at work on a movie version of the Ewing escapades, set for release in 2004. Based on Internet sources, namely www.ultimatedallas.com, the movie Dallas will be set in modern times at a Ewing-run energy company in a post-Enron world. Rumor has it that Kevin Costner and John Travolta were slated to star in the coveted bad-guy role of J.R. Ewing. Now Bruce Willis is the leading contender. Jessica Lange’s name has been seen more than once in connection with the dipsomaniac Sue Ellen. Irish hunk Colin Farrell has been linked to the role of Bobby Ewing. Here’s who we’d like to see:

As Jock, the grumpy but lovable father of J.R.
and Bobby: JACK NICHOLSON

As the Ms. Ellie, the lovable but stern family
matriarch: DAME JUDI DENCH

As Digger, Jock’s bitter, grumpy, alcoholic, and yet
lovable rival: SEAN CONNERY

As Ray Krebbs, the lovable loser half-brother of
Bobby and J.R.: ADAM SANDLER

As Cliff Barnes, J.R.’s bitter but lovable rival:
ALEC BALDWIN or DANIEL BALDWIN—maybe both

As Pam Barnes-Ewing, Bobby’s melodramatic,
lovable, and hot wife: DENISE RICHARDS

As Kristen Shepard, Sue Ellen’s crazy sister
who shoots J.R.: ANNE HECHE

As Lucy, J.R.’s trampy but lovable niece:      
ASHLEY OLSEN or MARY KATE OLSEN—maybe both

 

PLACE YOUR BETS: Herewith are the spreads on upcoming propositions, as determined by our crack team of handicappers. The home team is in all caps. And remember: gambling is illegal, except for the Lottery.

FAVORITE

SPREAD

UNDERDOG

Rangers Winning the Pennant

Pick ‘em

PIGS FLYING

BILL PARCELS

8 1/2

Bruce Lietzke

Itching

1 1/2

BURNING

HOT

Pick ‘em

Humid

BEEF FAJITAS

2

Chicken Fajitas

West Nile

10

MONKEY POX

Boating Accident

4

HEAT STROKE

 

THE LIST

Cindy Dyer
Fred Kleisner
Chris Harris
Marilu Malato
Bill Saunders
Darius Cordell
Happy Yancey
Roger Enrico
Maxwell Scarlett
Kelly Erhardt
Marion Rothstein
Doug Hawthorne
Blackie Holmes
Chelsea Keifer
Irwin Lightstone
Ellen McMillan
Michael Turner
Bill Waxenberg
Sean McKenna
Wilna Aday
Glenn Wyatt
Laura Gordon
Steve Van Amburgh
Mitch Muncy
Juris Laivins
Matt Frazier
Dona Martinez
Amy Weaver

 

WOMAN ON TOP

CAROLYN NEFF (pictured right) wouldn’t tell us how old she is, so we had to dig up her driver’s license record. She’s 32. And now that we’ve done her that disservice, we expect Neff won’t let us into downtown’s newest hotspot, Club Blue. She’s the marketing director of Blue and a minority partner in its ownership. This makes us sad, because Blue sounds cool. Next door to the Majestic Theater, in the old Hart Furniture Building, it features a downstairs Cajun restaurant called Kindal’s and an upstairs dance area complete with mermaids serving sushi and trapeze artists working high wires out of a DJ booth. At least, though, we didn’t barge in on Neff while she was using the bathroom, an embarrassment she suffered back when she played Raquel on All My Children. Neff says, “A women who watched the show pushed the door open and screamed, ’I can’t believe you’re trying to break up Hayley and Mateo!’” We just couldn’t believe Neff is 32. —Kristie Ramirez

Photo Courtesy of Campbell Agency


QUESTION & ANSWER

In 1986, Dallas’ CHRISTY FICHTNER beat runner-up Halle Berry for the title of Miss USA. This year, Fichtner competes for the title of Mrs. on Who Wants to Marry My Dad? The show premieres July 14 on NBC.

D Magazine: With this show, your skills as a parent are going to be on display just as much as your ability to be a good spouse. That said, what are your views on spanking?

Christy Fichtner: [Laughs] Are you serious? I am opposed to spanking. To me, it, um—is this question in relation to kids?

 

NOW SMELL THIS

UP IN THE TINY COMMUNITY OF CLIMAX, just east of McKinney, Jackie Hughes makes some of the most potent catfish bait known to man. It’s called the “Bells of Hell Stinkbait,” and Hughes likes to say that it smells so awful that “if you get it on your hands, you have to cut your hands off.” Hughes, in fact, has been quoted on the front page of the Wall Street Journal saying exactly that.

The other day, Hughes had company out to his modest ranch to talk about catfishing—though, thanks to a bulging disc in his back, he hasn’t been out on the lake as much as he’d like—and to demonstrate how he makes his famous stinkbait. As he stood in his driveway and a cat with no name wound its way around his ankles, Hughes dumped hog brains into a 55-gallon barrel. He’d let a couple cases of Bryan-brand brains sit in the sun for a few days to let them ripen, and it didn’t take long for the flies to gather. A low-level buzz—and a formidable stench—filled the air.

“Usually I like to have a few beers before I do this,” he said. “It helps. But with the pain pills for my back, I didn’t figure that would be a good idea.”
When his great-uncle taught him how to make stinkbait 25 years ago, “cats” were not a popular game fish. That has changed, though, with the advent of cable-television fishing shows and magazines like Catfish Insider. Because it is widely believed that good catfish bait must stink like hell, a cottage industry has taken off, with anglers making and selling their own secret blends of smelly stuff. Hughes gives his stinkbait to friends and offers the recipe for free on his web site.

After the hog brains came the rotten wheels of longhorn-style cheddar, which Hughes squeezed through his fingers. He used rubber surgical gloves so he didn’t have to cut off his hands. Then came the shad, also rotten. Next step: letting the entire mess sit in a pasture, under the sun, stirring it every day with an electric paint mixer, until the maggots come and blossom into flies. Put it into jars any sooner, and the gases escaping from the “Bells of Hell” will literally make the jars explode.

Hughes is 52 years old, and he’s got a good job as a road-construction inspector for the city of Plano. He has a steady girlfriend, so interested ladies need not contact him. But by the time this article appears, he’ll probably still have some stinkbait on his hands (figuratively speaking, of course). Interested anglers can find him at www.members.aol.com/jackfish7/stink.html. —T.R.

Photo by Tim Rogers

 

BOOK ‘EM BUSH

This set of bookends is McKinney artist Robert Dobscha’s first work in bronze. Bush and Saddam stand a foot tall and peek around the spines of their books at each other. A limited, first-edition pair goes for $5,000. Dobscha plans to design other bookend pairs of “people who change the world.” www.dobschastudios.com.

Photo by Abel Sanchez

 

A RECORD YOU SHOULD BUY

For a quarter-century, one of the world’s most acclaimed blues bands has been led by a guitarist not from Mississippi or Chicago—but from Plano.
Anson Funderburgh, born there in 1954, formed his Rockets in ’78 and with his guitar did more to break blues critics’ bias against white musicians than the vaunted Vaughans. Their new CD, out July 29, is the Rockets’ 25th anniversary release. Which Way Is Texas? contains three covers but thankfully avoids warhorses of the sort many blues contenders do to death. Singer/harmonist Sam Myers’ soulful voice is fine for B.B. King’s surprisingly obscure “Jungle,” and his harmonica tweaks Louisiana bluesman Tabby Thomas’ surreal “Hoodoo Party.” Throughout, Anson’s guitar sets him apart from the blues rabble that crams a million useless notes into every bar. And for the first time Anson sings! His pipes have authority on “Toss and Turn,” and they absolutely kill on “One Woman I Need.” Not bad at all for a Plano guy singing the blues. Visit your local megastore or go to www.rounder.com. —Tim Schuller

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