ANOTHER LAYER OF ICE

PAST TENSE Last year, rap fans discovered to their shock that VANILLA ICE had been perpetratin’ a mean-streets, Miami-based background to give himself more of that homeboy history expected of a hard-core rapper. Ice, born ROBIE VAN WINKLE, had actually passed most of his high-school career in the white-bread environs of Carrollton, where he chilled in full effect at R. L. Turner High School.

Now D Magazine has probed even further into the Van Winkle legend-and learned that his unremarkable high-school years have roots in an equally bland middle-school career.

During the ninth grade, Van Winkle lived in Paris-Texas-where he did little to distinguish himself. The proto-Ice did, however, join the Future Farmers of America, setting up a meaty conundrum for his biographers: What was his project for the local show? A heifer? A Berkshire sow?

Alas, we may never know. ROBERT MILFORD, head sponsor of the Paris FFA, could only suggest that the leadership skills taught by FFA may have aided Robbie in his rise to hip-hop superstardom. No doubt, but the world cries out for more. Next: The Kindergarten Years. -Casey Inge