INSIGHTS

This month Texas teachers will undergo those long-awaited competency tests that were part of the educational reform package known as House Bill 72. Why should they sweat it out alone? We all have a stake in better education, so here are some questions for the rest of us. Sample answers have been provided in some cases.

1. Decide which current controversy theauthor of this parable has in mind. A faithfulold dog was always kept in the back yard.The children loved to play with the dog whenthey were young, but as they grew older theyforgot how the dog had always helped themwhen they were afraid or lost. Once in awhile they threw the dog a few scraps, but nomatter how bad the weather or how thick themosquitoes, he stayed outside. When onechild suggested doing more for the dog, hisparents laughed: “Do you want to give upyour allowance so that lazy dog can eat steakand live in a fancy doghouse?1’ Of coursenobody wanted to do that.

Then a law was passed ordering people to take better care of their pets. The old dog’s heart pounded with joy; at last they would repay him for his years of service. “We want you to come into the house and sleep by the fire” his master said. “But first, you’ll need a series of disinfectant baths. And of course house dogs must learn to roll over and fetch the slippers. When you prove you can do these things, we’ll bring you in. After all, you’re getting better food and a nice new collar. We want to know we’re getting a good return on our investment.” Confused and angry, the old dog thought for a second, then sank his teeth into his master’s leg.

2. A spokesperson for the tobacco industry says that cigarette ads don’t causepeople to smoke. A spokesperson for theNational Rifle Association says that smallhandguns have no connection with crimeand violence. A spokesperson for a teachers’organization says that the competency testswill tell us nothing important about ateacher. Who has the flimsiest argument?

3. Assume that the brains of librarians cost$300 a pound. The brains of physicists cost$500 a pound. The brains of the Texas coaches against the “no-pass, no-play” rule cost $110,000 a pound. What would account for the higher cost of the coaches’ brains?

A. Do you know how many it takes to make a pound?

4. Joe, a math teacher for five years, ismad about the competency tests. “Whyshould I be tested?” he asks. “I have amaster’s degree in education.” What iswrong with Joe’s reasoning?

A. The unstated, unsound premise of Joe’s argument is that more degrees for teachers mean better education for students. That’s not necessarily so, especially if the advanced degrees are in education rather than the teacher’s subject. Education courses often focus on method, not the subject that the teacher will be teaching. Anyway, the competency tests aren’t designed to reveal the best teachers, those who inspire the young and ignite their curiosity. No test can do that. The tests simply ask for some proof of basic, low-level literacy, and that shouldn’t be such a tall order.

5. Rowena is a brilliant history teacherwith a master’s degree and twenty-five yearsof experience. At the age of fifty, she makesjust over $30,000. She sees the competencytests as an insult and complains to you, anenlightened principal (not an oxymoron).What do you tell her?

A. Rowena, these tests are not for you. They are designed to weed out the teachers who give the profession a bad name-the teachers who write “Hes not listing too his lessons” in a note to parents. These tests, like the other reforms, are far from perfect, but they’re a step toward making education matter in this state. You’re mad because you think these reforms were imposed on you by businessmen and bureaucrats, and you’re partly right. Teachers have always been second-class citizens because, traditionally, most teachers have been female and most administrators male. It’s a very paternalistic system. “You gals go teach and us guys will make the big decisions.” Still, stumbling in the right direction is better than not moving at all.

6. You are a bureaucrat who helped designthe competency tests. You have been given atruth serum and cannot lie. Answer thesequestions: Won’t the tests fail a disproportionate number of black teachers, themselvesthe products of the worst of the pre-reformschools? Is that fair? Aren’t black teachers needed more than ever as role models for black children whose families are crumbling in record numbers?

A. Yes, no, and yes. We will have fewer black teachers than ever in two years unless we lower the standards of the tests or the courts find the tests unconstitutional. This is awful, but it is time for pragmatism and realpolitik. We must make visible sacrifices of many teachers, both black and white, in order to regain support of public education by the middle and upper classes. The public schools, especially in large cities, are becoming educational ghettoes for those who can’t afford private schools-and that’s bad for students of all races.

7. Mary must design a school system. Shemust divide her $100,000 personnel budgetbetween a geometry teacher who has job offers from industry, a coach who also teachesdrivers’ ed and study hall, a principal, anda vice-president of Administrative Oversightand Euphemism. She decides to pay her people according to the time they actually spendimproving students’ minds-a novel idea.She pays the geometry teacher $40,000, thecoach $30,000, the principal $20,000, andthe VP-AOE $10,000. What is wrong withMary’s system?

A, I don’t know.

8. Assume that 15 percent of Texas teachers fail the tests. Assume that 10 percent failthe second time. When school starts nextfell, many large districts face drastic teachershortages. Which is the more likely scenario?

A. Texans realize that it’s time to swallowa bitter pill. They refuse to see the testsscrapped or watered down. Despite kamikaze opposition from the teachers’ lobbies,they re-elect the governor who made education a priority and support the inevitable taxincreases that will pay to make teaching attractive to the best minds.

B. Texans hide their heads in the sand anddecide they’ve heard enough bad news. Theyelect a flinty-hearted Republican governorwho thinks the schools could use a littlebenign neglect, since most members of hisnatural constituency send their kids to private schools anyway. Voters send a flock ofconservative, taxophobic House members tothe state legislature, where they chip away atthe reforms. “No-read, no-need” again becomes the rule for athletes. The rising tideof mediocrity that threatens our schoolsrises, and rises, and . . .