On the way to work, I saw this DART bus, and it reminded me that you turn 24 today. Happy birthday, Luka! Here’s what I got you:
—The patience to not get distracted by nearly every missed foul call
—A copy of the NBA’s rulebook, so you can learn when an inbounds pass in the last seconds of a game can be thrown into the backcourt
—A Siberian tiger named Story, because I know you like tigers
—A Starbucks gift card
—A 7-foot-1 rim protector who can also run the floor
—Full control of your trademark and a reconciliation with your popular mom
—A D Magazine-branded pizza wheel (we had a few left over from the subscriber-only event last night at Thunderbird Pies)
—The Michael Jordan Trophy, which, as you know, is awarded to the Kia NBA Most Valuable Player
—Kyrie Irving’s heart (not the actual organ)
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