Friday, February 23, 2024 Feb 23, 2024
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Local News

More Evidence of Goblin Death Cult at White Rock Lake

When is Chief Eddie García going to address this matter?!
By Tim Rogers |

About two weeks ago, I broke the news that goblins had built a structure on the shores of White Rock Lake that they were clearly using to conduct human sacrifice. I wrote at the time: “[T]he danger this presents to our community needs to be addressed immediately by Chief Eddie García. Forget street racing. Dallas’ real problem is the goblin death cult at the lake.” Today, I bring you news that the problem has only gotten worse.

The image above was captured over the weekend. As you can see, there are now two goblin death cult driftwood teepees. That is a 100 percent increase in goblin death cult driftwood teepees. I have done the math. At this rate, with the goblin death cult doubling its number of driftwood teepees every two weeks, in three months’ time, there will be 128 goblin death cult driftwood teepees at White Rock Lake, with a commensurate increase in human sacrifice.

Admittedly, that would be a world-class development of goblin death cult driftwood teepees, but I don’t think anyone in Dallas wants to be known for that. Well, except the goblins. Councilman Lee Kleinman has voiced his opposition to the Dallas Police Department’s mounted unit. This situation shows his shortsightedness. I hereby call on Chief Eddie García to saddle up and ride!

Also, the For the Love of the Lake volunteers who do the second Saturday shoreline spruce up should be armed.

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