Johnson is still making trouble.

Religion

Peter Johnson Just Taped His 95 Theses to the Doors at First Baptist

Sadly, he did not get arrested.

UPDATE (11/22/18) Here’s video of Peter taping his theses to the doors of First Baptist.

***

Hoofing it through downtown a bit ago to grab lunch, I ran into the Rev. Peter Johnson, near the corner of St. Paul and San Jacinto streets. He had a sheaf of papers under his arm and a cameraman at his elbow.

“Hey, Peter, what are you up to?” I asked.

“I just taped my 95 theses to the doors of First Baptist,” he said, handing me an 8-page stapled copy. “Channel 8 was there, and we were filming, too, until a security guard made me leave.”

I looked over at the church — or, rather, at the crazy fountain and St. Paul Cafe. One wonders what Martin Luther would have to say about all that and about Robert Jeffress himself, the senior pastor at First Baptist, the one who scurries to television in defense of every Trump utterance, including his recent “shithole” remark. 

“Did you get every door?” I asked Peter.

“Yup.”

“Including the ones to the original sanctuary?”

“Sure did.”

“Were you tempted to use nails, like Martin Luther did it? Oh, I guess you needed tape. Too many glass doors.”

“I didn’t want them to get me for destroying property,” Peter said. “I still thought they might arrest me. I told my personal lawyer not to bail me out. Just let me stay in jail. My wife was giving me all kinds of hell this morning.”

I think he was a little disappointed that he didn’t get to take a ride in the back of a squad car. We parted ways after I promised to write something about what he’d just done. As for his 95 theses, they are a mix of scripture and quotes from Martin Luther King Jr.

“Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.” —Hebrews 13:1-2

“The soft-minded man always fears change. He feels security in the status quo, and he has an almost morbid fear of the new. For him, the greatest pain is the pain of a new idea.” —MLK Jr.

I’m not going to print the other 93 of Peter’s theses. Hopefully someone at First Baptist will bring them all to Jeffress and he’ll find the time to read them.

Comments

  • Brian Youngblood

    I had a hard time getting through all of your plural uses of thesis, but your grammar stays intact. Well done sir.

  • @zaccrain

    Tim, I know you are only eight feet from me, but let me just say, here, that I enjoyed this post.

    • This is exactly why our decision today not to kill comments on the blog was a brilliant move. Thank you, Zac!

      • @zaccrain

        So, this is what a conversation is like. OK! I get it now!!!

        • MistakeByTheLake

          Oh barf. This is is what sucking up to Tim looks like. Hey Tim, why do you pretend to hold the moral high ground here? It is not yours, sir. On this and many other subjects.

          • @zaccrain

            MistakeByTheLake, thank you for calling out me (and Tim) on our lack of moral fiber. This is why we continue to offer this space to you and others.

  • dallasmay

    I was actually hoping to read the 95 theses here. I mean, it shouldn’t be too hard to come up with 95 heresies from that church.

    • PeterTx52

      Im sure you can come up with some

  • PeterTx52

    The gentleman may wish to study up on what Luthers theses were and howcthey were constructed.

  • Fernando

    I’ve looked this man in the eyes, and everyone else should before passing judgment.

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  • Guthrum

    I have not read all of Luther’s theses. Our church spent a lot of time talking about Luther’s theology, his catechism, and the creeds.
    I would say most churches are striving to teach and preach the Gospel, and help people.
    See “Radical Church” – the model of the new church.