Former Dallas Mavericks forward Charlie Villanueva returned home Tuesday night to find his toilet gone. So, as low-tier Dallas professional athletes this year have tended to do when their property is missing, he took to social media to report the apparent burglary.
They stole my toilet…… I’m not making this shit up. Still waiting @DallasPD pic.twitter.com/Go9BP3itSB
— Charlie Villanueva (@CVBelieve) December 20, 2017
Like many Dallas residents, Villanueva also experienced some frustration with the Dallas Police Department’s response time. Celebrities: They’re just like us!
I called @DallasPD at 6:50pm it’s 10:41pm and no response from them, called 4 times already #findmytoliet
— Charlie Villanueva (@CVBelieve) December 20, 2017
For symmetry’s sake, in keeping with the saga of Lucky Whitehead’s dog, all we need now is for a Fort Worth rapper with a funny name to announce on Instagram that he has the toilet, followed by an emotional reunion in some parking lot, filmed in portrait mode on a cell phone through a haze of blunt smoke, posted on social media and subsequently aggregated by bloggers in an empty office counting down the minutes until they get a few days off for the holidays.
