Yesterday, Tim came to my desk around 3:30 and asked what I thought about doing an ask-me-anything-style podcast. I said it sounded OK. He asked if I wanted to do it in 15 minutes. I didn’t know about that. I figured we wouldn’t get many questions with such little notice. And initially, as usual, I was right. We didn’t. None on Facebook, even though we all put up the bat signal. Probably because Facebook is kind of trash. Anyway.
As we started going, though, we — me, Tim, and city columnist Eric Celeste — ended up having too many to answer. (We also answered one of my gloriously dumb hypotheticals.) So I’ll answer a few myself. First, the show.
[d-embed]
Which Dallas council member do you call to help you a) win a fistfight b) be your wingman c) do a duet in karaoke
— Patrick Blaydes (@TheBlaydes) September 29, 2017
[/d-embed]
Patrick, great question. Give me “the most trill councilman ever,” Dwaine Caraway, for all three.
[d-embed]
Would you rather eat a square inch of old carpet or a handful of Trinity River deposit?
— PLAYGIRL (@jessisupreme) September 28, 2017
[/d-embed]
We all answered this on Twitter, and you can look there, but just know my answer — give me the carpet — was roundly mocked. I’m standing by it. I’ve been around the Trinity to know that that might be a bridge too far for my digestive system.
[d-embed]
Would you give up being able to pronounce the letter T in all words if it saved one kid’s life in Chad?
— Jay Cranfill (@jaycranfill) September 28, 2017
[/d-embed]
I’m going to say yes, even though I’m not sure if this means I can’t say the T or just sound really dumb (dumber?) when I try to say it. Am I lisping? OK. Fine.
[d-embed]
If space were a gender which would it be?
— tweetnewbs (@austinnewbre) September 28, 2017
[/d-embed]
Gut reaction: female. Awesome, mysterious, and Mike Pence will never touch it.
[d-embed]
If you were really a robot, would you want to know?
— tweetnewbs (@austinnewbre) September 28, 2017
[/d-embed]
010101010 101010101 101010101010 101010001 01010101010 1010101010 0000101010
)
,,
[d-embed]
Is your cat making too much noise all the time?
— tweetnewbs (@austinnewbre) September 28, 2017
[/d-embed]
Oh my god. To the point that my neighbors must think I’m in an emotionally abusive relationship with a woman named Sally. My cat’s name is Sally. That’s the joke that I made there.
[d-embed]
Will Texas ever turn blue?
— Chill Mickelson (@ipissexcllnce) September 28, 2017
[/d-embed]
Oops, put a serious one in there. Um, probably not. Or not as soon as people might think or want. The big cities are already pretty substantially blue, but Texas is so vast and filled with small towns that are — and I’m sorry for this political jargon — redder than hell. So it’s going to take a minute.
[d-embed]
Why is Dallas the most ahistorical city in the country?
— #TakeEmDownDAL (@JerryLEADS) September 28, 2017
[/d-embed]
Oh, another serious one. I need to get this post up, so I’m not going to get super deep on this — and I could — but I think a lot of it comes from Dallas’ idea of itself as a place where things get done, and a lot of times that means never looking back, never letting history or emotion get in the way of progress, to a fault. We have done a lot of stupid, short-sighted things in service to this idea. OK, one more.
[d-embed]
What are you replacing the National Anthem with?
— PLAYGIRL (@jessisupreme) September 28, 2017
[/d-embed]
[d-embed][/d-embed]
