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A New List of Hacky Yu Darvish Headline Puns

Attention: area copy desks.
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I’ve done this a couple of times. Is it really possible I haven’t done it in five years? That does not seem like me at all. At any rate, with Opening Day coming up next week, and Yu Darvish set to take the hill (that’s a baseball term), here are a selection of Yu-based puns to get you through the insanely, pointlessly long baseball season.

  • All Yu Need Is Kill (subhead: “Can Darvish get back his mean streak?”)
  • Yu-topia (after a great first month)
  • Now Yu See Me (general)
  • That Thing Yu Do (also general)
  • He’s Just Not That Into Yu (after Darvish is passed over to start All-Star Game)
  • Southside With Yu (after great win over ChiSox)
  • Curling Darvish (offday fun at the ice rink in Toronto, I guess)
  • Melt With Yu (summer calendar piece about Rangers games)
  • Yu Tube (after video of Darvish tearing up the club is leaked, goes viral)
  • The Company Yu Keep (after Johnny Manziel is spotted in leaked club video)
  • Yu Can’t Do That On Television (video still in the news cycle)
  • (Everything I Do) I Do it For Yu (takeout feature on Yu’s translator and American team, as the team tries to change the conversation)
  • 10 Things I Hate About Yu (cranky Kevin Sherrington column)
  • Nathan For Yu (after former Rangers closer Joe Nathan begins mentoring Darvish, following what is now being called “The Manziel Video”)
  • Yu Got Served (run above photo of Darvish turning to watch towering home run)
  • I’m Gonna Get Yu, Sucka (rival GM details plan for acquisition)
  • Now Yu See Me 2 (I don’t know)

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