Tim Rogers and I had our first fight today. At least according to him. I would have called it an opportunity for an optional correction, or at most a grammatical disagreement. (My eyes weren’t blinking rapidly. That’s how people who know me know things have escalated to a dangerous level.)
It involved the July cover. Granted, Tim was under a great deal of stress. His roof is leaking, he had to put on a blazer for his ed note photo, and he was listening to a food safety seminar online (still not sure why) while submitting an entry for a magazine award.
As the new editor on staff, I’m still in the hyper-vigilant, I’m-not-sure-how-y’all-do-things-around-here-but-I’ll-try-to-ask-questions-that-imply-some-level-of-competence-and-interest stage.
While reviewing the cover proofs, I noticed a capitalization discrepancy. In some instances, the word “to” was capitalized, and in some instances it was not. I tried to get Tim’s attention from my desk, which is, in fact, attached to his.
Kathy: Hey, Tim.
Tim: Yes?
Kathy (trying to sound deferential): I don’t think all these “To”s on the cover should be capitalized.
Tim (trying not to sound patronizing): Yes, they should. Because prepositions are capitalized when they are part of the verb: “Why Is My Friend Trying To Buy My House.”
Kathy: Except it’s not an inseparable part of the verb in that case. It’s just the infinitive form. That’s why “Get Down” would be capped but not “How to Get Down.”
Tim (nearly imperceptible pause): You’re wrong. (rapid Googling ensues)
Kathy: I mean, if you want to do it incorrectly, at least be consistent.
Tim (still Googling madly): Even if “To” is being used as what you call an infinitive, it’s still an essential part of the verb.
Kathy: No it’s not.
Tim: That law school tuition was clearly worth every penny.
Kathy: I know you are but what am I.
Tim: Well, here’s a website that implies you might be right. Cap away if you’re so inclined.
Kathy: I am.
Tim: Did we just have our first fight?
Kathy: No. When we do, you won’t have to ask.
