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Museum Tower Should Probably Take Me Off Their Marketing List

What's your definition of "just steps away"?
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MuseumTower

I promise that I don’t get up the morning and wonder how I’m going to poke fun at Museum Tower. But they keep sending me these marketing emails that demand my attention. Yesterday, I tried to figure out how they could claim that the building is 25 percent sold, when DCAD data suggest it’s more like 12 percent. I did hear back from Barbara Buzzell, their PR rep, by the way. She wrote:

Not every home at Museum Tower is the same size. As you may know, we have nine different published floor plans. Because of the many variable home sizes sold, we have released the aggregate amount of saleable square footage sold. That number is nearly 25 percent of the building’s total saleable square footage.

I asked her if I got any of my numbers wrong. No response from her yet.

Anyway, just as I was adding her comment to yesterday’s post, I got another marketing email from Museum Tower. It was accompanied by the handsome picture you see here. The message read:

Living at Museum Tower, you’re at the center of a world of wonder. Take a look at this month’s collection of the finest art, performances and entertainment just steps away from Museum Tower and nearby.

There followed a list of events that the 14 owners of Museum Tower condos can walk to. The list includes Imagination Playground Klyde Warren Park (nice); “ReMix Ástor Piazzolla: Tango to Argentina” at Dallas City Performance Hall (sounds fun); Spring Break at the Perot Museum (sure, even though that walk along the Woodall Rodgers access road ain’t that pretty); Elton John at American Airlines Center (Yes, that’s doable. Again, not the prettiest walk. But it really wouldn’t make any sense to drive.); Savor Dallas 2014 (Okay, Savor Dallas includes a wine stroll in the Arts District. But the rest of the gig happens at the Omni and the Convention Center. Now we’re talking a pretty ambitious walk. Like, forget doing this in heels. But I guess this falls under the heading of “nearby.”); “FOCUS: Fred Tomaselli” at The Modern Art Museum of Fort Worth (Whoa! Whoa! This isn’t anywhere close to “nearby.” I checked Google maps, and it says that walk will take 11 hours and 20 minutes.); and the Rangers home opener at Globe Life Park (Now I get it. This is a prank, right? You trick someone into buying a condo in Museum Tower. Then, when they come down to the front desk and ask for walking directions to a Rangers game, the front desk guy falls down laughing. That’s gotta be it.).

Glenn Hunter, I await your rebuttal. Do they also do this in L.A. at the Century tower?

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