Leading Off (11/1/13)

New Abortion Restrictions Begin Today. A federal appeals court said Thursday that most of Texas’ strict new limits on abortion can go into effect, lifting a portion of the injunction issued on Monday by a a U.S. district judge who had ruled portions of the law unconstitutional. A third of the state’s clinics that perform the procedure will no longer be able to, as their doctors must now have admitting privileges at a nearby hospital to do so. The court’s order is temporary, until it can hold a complete hearing, which is expected to take place in January.

Parents’ Brawl Cancels Pee Wee Playoffs. “Adults” legally responsible for the care and supervision of children got into a physical confrontation following a youth football game on Monday. One Crowley woman allegedly pulled a Weatherford man from a car, started beating on him, and bit his thumb. Both teams were suspended from the league playoffs.

Dallas Zoo to Unveil Young Okapi. Okapis are rare animals from the rainforests of Congo that look like a cross between zebras, giraffes, and horses. The zoo has a new young’n set to make her first public appearance today. Fun fact about okapis: they don’t urinate until they’re about a month old and don’t defecate until they’re 2 to 3 months. In related news, parents and prospective parents of newborn babies now eagerly await scientific advances that will allow the splicing of okapi and human DNA.


  • James

    What is the going rate for an okapi hunt? And does the Zoo have a charitable foundation?

  • Avid Reader

    Could you kill an okapi with your bare hands?

  • Zac Crain

    Though I’m sure Mike would answer in the affirmative, I tend to doubt it. It’s like killing a horse.

  • Bill Marvel

    i don’t know what Pee Wee football does to the brains of the kids who play it, but it obviously destroys the brains of their parents.

  • Bill Marvel

    Could Mooney kill an okapi with his bare hands?