Rick Perry Speaks at Texas-Israel Chamber of Commerce Dinner Tonight In Dallas

Thanks to my side gig as a looper, I’ve seen the speech and, in a way I’m sure you are familiar with by now, I’ve recreated it.

“Shalom, y’all. Harahefet sh’eli mele’ah betzlofahim.”
“How’d I do? Don’t really know what it means. Chuck was trying to teach me some Hebrew out in the van, but for the first 20 minutes I thought he was just trying to cough up a hairball, so I was catching up on my Field & Stream. Had a good piece about Tom Wopat going bowhunting.”
“Now, the reason why I’m here is to talk about strategic partnerships between Israel and Texas going forward into the future. Let me lay something on you guys.”
“Bubba & Bubbeh’s. It’s a Jewish barbecue joint. Huh? Huh? Had that one in my dream journal for about three years now.”
“Tell me that doesn’t sound delicious!”
“Anyway, that’s really all I got. Manischewitz me, Chuck!”


  • GMOM

    Brilliant, nailed it, Zac!!

  • ml

    hilarious. Love the red yamulke.

  • Steve

    Oh I really want to read that dream journal. Get to work!

  • Very Ticket-like gunshot sort of ending. Total give-up. But it worked.

  • Amy S

    I’m guessing it won’t sell pork. But killa brisket.

  • senorita cindita

    I was there, and that’s about what it was like.

  • Señorita Icalbulschidt

    Señorita Cindita, you were ‘there’? Really? So where is ‘there’ and what did the gov talk about?