Friday, March 29, 2024 Mar 29, 2024
71° F Dallas, TX
Advertisement
Crime

Cops: Taking The Fun Out of Words Since Forever

By Bradford Pearson |

I was skimming through this Morning News story this afternoon (a really fun, quick-hit crime story involving a fire extinguisher, and great mugshot) when I stumbled upon this line:

“Not knowing if arrestee had any saliva borne diseases [the officer] was forced to take ahold of arrestee’s head and secure it against the blacktop,” the report says.

Rewritten:

“I wasn’t sure if this lunatic was gonna bite me, so I had to grab his head and slam it to the pavement,” the report says.

See? How much more fun (and accurate) is that?

Related Articles

Image
Arts & Entertainment

Here’s Who Is Coming to Dallas This Weekend: March 28-31

It's going to be a gorgeous weekend. Pencil in some live music in between those egg hunts and brunches.
Image
Arts & Entertainment

Arlington Museum of Art Debuts Two Must-See Nature-Inspired Additions

The chill of the Arctic Circle and a futuristic digital archive mark the grand opening of the Arlington Museum of Art’s new location.
By Brett Grega
Image
Arts & Entertainment

An Award-Winning SXSW Short Gave a Dallas Filmmaker an Outlet for Her Grief

Sara Nimeh balances humor and poignancy in a coming-of-age drama inspired by her childhood memories.
By Todd Jorgenson
Advertisement