Jailhouse Letter From Barrett Brown

I write a National Magazine Award-winning profile of the kid, and what do I get? I get demands. Barrett is in jail. I’ve been trying to talk with him. So he writes me the following letter. Before he’ll consent to an interview, he says I must post it. So I’m posting it.

Tim —

Yo yo. As I’ve just relayed through other channels, all media will have to be done in accordance with a new policy that will ensure that I am protected from incompetence, whim, happenstance, and other of my immortal enemies. For instance, any interviews done from jail will have to be done in such a way as that the entirety is available to all, so even an article with quotes would have to link to an audio recording which in turn may be done over your end if I am told what time to call collect.

Before I do an interview with D Magazine, the following conditions must be met:

1. This entire letter must be posted to FrontBurner.

2. It must be noted that I am not on drugs other than the few milligrams of Suboxone I have been prescribed for two years now, and that I had been reducing my intake of that opiate in the days leading up to my arrest. This was made clear in the last three videos that I can now confirm to have been successful, and may be confirmed by my girlfriend Jenna.

3. I need a copy of Zero History, by William Gibson, delivered from Amazon or Barnes and Noble.

The best way to respond is by mail. Keep it real, yo.

Barrett, Founder of Project PM

P.S. I was punched twice today. I did not respond with violence. Tell feds.

So there you have it. Sounds like Barrett still has his sense of humor. I’ll get the book sent to him shortly. We’ll see where this heads.


  • RAB

    Send him “Rescue Me” by Rachel Gibson (http://www.amazon.com/Rescue-Me-Rachel-Gibson/dp/0062069128/ref=sr_1_5?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1349816985&sr=1-5&keywords=gibson). When he complains, tell him that his letter was a bit illegible. Sorry! Then send him “Count Zero” by William Gibson just to eff with him a bit more.

  • Dubious Brother

    Does “punched twice” mean the same when you are in jail as when you are in the school yard?

  • Tsizzleorfizzle

    Tell him beggars can’t be choosers and buy him the book from an independent bookseller. Make the world a better place.

  • Regarding the potential for him to be gravely misquoted, will you please send him:




    It’s by someone who was murdered by the DOJ under circumstances similar to his.

  • GTR

    Why do I expect the FBI interview tapes of this purse pooch to become collectors’ items when they finally find their way to Ebay? Not by legions of script kiddies and those sporting finely tailored Empire storm troopers uniforms, mind you, but by budget sports bar owners and patrons.

  • Brad

    @Tsizzleorfizzle When incarcerated, there are rules regarding how materials may be received from outside sources (some of which may make perfect sense and some of which may make no sense at all). It could very well be that the only way that Barrett can receive a book is when it is sent directly from Amazon or Barnes and Noble.

  • steve billinghurst

    Tsizzleorfizzle, sir, locked up in much of statements Barrett makes are practical matters he does not want to bore you with, since all of it is, by his request, to be disseminated intact. Could it not be that, since he asks to be placed in front of him this particular tasty tome, that he will justifiably flip would it turn out to have come to the prison and been returned because of something we are not all aware of, such as the proper untampered packaging via this generally trustworthy corporation? Please do not give sagacious advice to others. I’m a sizzler, not an Anon. All my bougainvillea Sharktooth.

  • Maximum possible sentence will be received. 🙂