Thursday, April 25, 2024 Apr 25, 2024
74° F Dallas, TX
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Local News

Rolling Brown Outs? Not Cool. At All.

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As the temperature on the thermometer began climbing higher today, word started circulating that rolling brown outs were possible because the area was already maxing out on its system load whatsits, according to ERCOT. While I have already discussed my love of things like this, this, and this, I found something new to click and refresh on today: ERCOT’s fancy load graph, and Oncor’s maps that show current outages.

So listen, seriously. It’s hot. Really hot. Hot enough that having no electricity for an hour or so could make even the coolest house pretty gosh-darned toasty. So unless you want to just sit naked in a room, arms and legs akimbo, drinking lemonade and dousing yourself with what was ice water two minutes ago, ERCOT recommends the following*:

  1. Suck it up. You won’t die if your thermostat is set at 78 while you’re home. You might have to have a cool drink by your side, and you might need to sit around in your underwear or something, but you won’t die. You will just get to sit in your underwear drinking Maker’s Mark on the rocks.
  2. Turn some stuff off. Seriously. If you’re not in the room, does the light need to be on? No. No it does not. Unless you’re one of those sissies who is afraid of the dark. And since the worst of the load issues happens during the broad daylight, I shall call shenanigans if you do indeed say you are afraid of the dark. Also, jack up your thermostat to 85 when you’re not in the house. Who are you cooling during the day? The cat? Well, let me tell you, that cat won’t return the favor. The cat doesn’t care. The cat will just lick himself in really bad, inappropriate places and laugh at your discomfort. So you know, screw the cat.  Are you going to whine now about how it’ll be hot when you get home? Because they make these programmable thermostats now, and you can set it to come back on and start cooling before you get home. Technology is awesome.
  3. If you’re not going to do any of those things, for heaven’s sake don’t brag about it. Because someone, somewhere, who is friends with a friend of yours on Facebook, is sitting in a hot house in the dark, and he or she wants to punch you in the throat.

* Edited slightly.

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