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Sports News

Word of Dirk Nowitzki’s Undeniable Awesomeness Has Reached the NYC Homeless Community

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If you follow me on Twitter — @zaccrain, where most of the tweets follow my continuing investigation into the sordid history of root beer and the scions of the Barq’s empire — you already know this. Anyway, I just got back from a much-need vacation from coming up with stupid hypotheticals and making Tim sad about his hair. My last evening in New York — which is where I was and I guess I could have mentioned that in the previous sentence, but I thought the headline implied it — I was just kind of wandering around, looking for a place to read and watch people. I stopped in a little park off of 7th Avenue. Across from me, spread over two park benches, were three homeless (I would guess; I didn’t actually ask) guys.

For a few minutes, they were talking about whatever. Then, talk turned to basketball.

I looked up from my book midway through their conversation, when I heard a familiar description. The general specifics of a certain tall baller from the G. The guy in the middle, the leader, or at least the only one who said much, was saying: “And he can shoot a high-arcing jumper like that? At 6-11, 7-feet tall? Woooo, boy. And he can put it on the floor? He badder than Bird. Badder than Bird! Shoot a jumper like that? Damn. Daaaaamn. And take it to the basket. Badder than Bird!” He went on in this vein for some time, noting that all Dirk lacked was a strong low post game, a point I would grant him with a few quibbles. Then he added that he wasn’t even mad to see Jason Terry and Shawn Marion get their rings, too. I guess there is some history there that I wasn’t privy to. I would have asked, but i didn’t want to interrupt and, at any rate, I wasn’t much interested.

Also of local note, his opinion of Lincoln High grad Chris Bosh? “Straight GARBAGE.”

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