1. So 80 dogs go missing from a Ferris animal shelter. They’re supposedly on a reservation. But no one knows exactly where. Rest assured the dogs are happy, fed, and loved. Don’t worry about the shelter’s past of police officers shooting feral dogs on sight and the city ordering animals only 15 days to be adopted before they’re euthanized. Seriously. I’m sure they’re all fine.
2. I appreciate a good entrepreneurial spirit. I happen to think these guys have good business sense. They’re going around robbing mom-and-pop pharmacy stores so they can get hydrocodone and OxyContin for free and turn around and sell the drugs to their awesome friends for a good amount of cash. Just like what happened with cupcakes and froyo, I can’t help but wonder, “Why didn’t I think of this first?”
3. Now for the hard-hitting news of the day: this guy decorated his yard with beer cans and Jessica Simpson wants a normal boyfriend (maybe a doctor or a chef)!