Leading Off (5/5/09)

1. Dallas and Tarrant counties reported no new confirmed cases of swine flu, and most of the cases reported so far have been mild. What is a “mild” case of swine flu? It feels more like Piglet flu. Thus ends my career. (Bow.)

2. The Dallas Cowboys never had Irving officials inspect the practice facility roof that collapsed after it was completed, as they were supposed to. Upon reading this, ambulance chasers across North Texas began searching for bigger houses. 

3. According to Steve Brown’s story today, Dallas officials are excited by the announcement that we are moving downtown later this year. Not quoted are various employees who would have said something like, “But our cubes are too small and the cube walls aren’t high enough and what about parking and I know I should be holding onto my effin hat BUT I AM OWED SOME ANSWERS! [pause, holding breath] And my binky. I would also like my binky.”

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