Friday, September 29, 2023 Sep 29, 2023
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Spoiler Alert: Lance Armstrong Supports Strengthened Smoking Ban

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Lance Armstrong (probably) hopped off his bike long enough to pen this op-ed column for the Morning News, encouraging the City Council to ban smoking pretty much everywhere. (As you know, I’m not a fan of that idea.) In favor of equal time, I’ve allowed myself this short rebuttal:

Dear Lance Armstrong,

I’ll stop smoking in bars when you can promise me I’ll never see another picture like this one. Or this one. Or this one. (That’s just a sample.) Because of you and McConaughey, everyone in America who is not a Texas Longhorns fan hates Texas Longhorns fans.


Zac Crain

UT ’96

P.S. Invoking the global economic crisis in your argument? Maybe overdoing it.