1. Retail sales went up on Black Friday then flattened out over the weekend, as shoppers realized no one has any money. At the Walmart in Port Isabel — where a sign over an aisle in the toy department points out where one can locate the “COLORIN BOOKS” — there was no discernible change.
2. If you’re still looking to cross a few items off your Christmas/Channukah/Kwanzaa shopping list, and hoping to do it on the cheap, you can always head to CityStore. That’s where you can — I’m sorry, I just saw that ex-Mav Devin Harris had a career-high 47 points last night, and I’m having trouble focusing, what with all the blood leaking out of my eyes, ears, and nose and everything.
3. Remember the guys who allegedly forced a 2-year-old and a 4-year-old to smoke a joint? One of them, Vanswan Polty, begins his trial on Tuesday. Not helping his case: the entire thing was filmed. Since testing revealed the kids had marijuana and cocaine in their systems, I hope Polty enjoys hell, or the closest equivalent the good people of Tarrant County can find for him.