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BOOT CAMP: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

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aj.JPGBoot camp is over, and yes, we survived it. We apologize for not posting
sooner, but Stacey’s been up to her eyeballs in the June issue, and Sarah
has been almost too tired to keep her eyes open, much less blog. Turns out,
neither of us has sweat that much since, oh, approx. 1995.

The gentleman here is our trainer, AJ. You guessed that, didn’t you.

Follow the jump for the (quick) four-day recap.


MONDAY

SARAH: We join about 40 others at 5:30 am outside American Airlines Center.
Some are in fantastic shape, others average, but a good/non-intimidating
group overall. No one talks to each other. My dad says this is because they
are “serious about training.” (?) DISCOVERY #1: Running a mile around the
American Airlines Center at fastest speed only lasts about halfway around
the building. Stacey, she runs fast. Cannot keep up. Following the first BC
I go home, take a shower, and fall into a dead sleep until 9 when I wake up
totally confused and already sore. Feel like crap all day. Body is
wondering, “what the &?** did you do?”

STACEY: Despite the presence of what are surely Mavs dancers on neighboring
mats, I’m feeling okay about myself. That is until we begin the core body
exercises. I curse my son for robbing me of my core strength as I struggle
to do even five regular sit-ups. I resort to crunches and resentment. The
AAC lap is painless. Not so my physical state the rest of the day. I go home
after BC, eat cereal, and am hungry again by 10 a.m.

DAY TWO

SARAH: It is raining, which I hope means BC is cancelled. I am dreading it.
No luck. We end up having training at the Fellowship Church downtown, and
things go pretty well. Body is in pain, but good pain. Buckets of sweat.
Lots of punching, kicking, and teeny-tiny push-ups because arms seemingly do
not work. DISCOVERY #2: Those crunches I’ve been doing for at least a decade
have resulted in NO abdominal muscles. Go home and feel good. No need for
sleep. Only need is for big breakfast and bigger coffee.

STACEY: Being indoors is stuffy, but I am hopeful that the program will
somehow be easier when contained within these hallowed walls. Not exactly.
We still have to run, but we also get to practice some kickboxing-type
moves. I won’t reveal which staff member’s face I picture punching.
Afterward, cereal just doesn’t seem to cut it anymore.

DAY THREE:
SARAH: Body is so sore it hurts to smile. Level of complaining is at it’s
maximum. Cannot believe I have to move. We are outside again, but the hour goes by fast because we are doing all sorts of fun agility drills. Trainer AJ is so nice and funny and says rhymes on cadence. DISCOVERY #3: The AAC smells like hot dogs, even at 5:45 am. Sick. But even sicker–I kind of like it.

STACEY: Push-ups are out of the question today. My core has not
strengthened, and my resolve has weakened. The drills are fun-ish. I enjoy
overhearing a bickering couple next to me. I wonder if their sex life has
been impeded by the profound soreness they must be feeling from all this
working out. Speaking of, I wonder if my husband hates BC as much as me? The
most redeeming part of day three: ginger pancakes from the Kozy (thanks
Sarah!). Nice.

DAY FOUR

SARAH: Yes! We have almost conquered BC! For some reason, my stomach area is
totally swollen. Stacey says these are muscles. DISCOVERY #5: The last day
is no fun. Lots of activities involving soccer balls and LOTS of running. No
fun cadence. 🙁 Sprints called “shuttles” at the end that nearly cause me to
keel over. Then, suddenly, we’re done. The end is a little anti-climactic. I
feel like I’ve bonded with AJ, but he just sort of waves us off. Hm. Stacey
and I head to Starbucks for a celebration latte. Overall: I haven’t worked
out that hard in years, and I am realizing that my workouts probably aren’t
really cutting it. But I’m not quite ready for a month-long commitment.

STACEY: AJ asks me why I’m not doing sit-ups. I throw out the kid excuse,
which he deems acceptable and then shows me an alternate torturous core
exercise to do. Foiled. The soccer ball exercises make me feel like Mia
Hamm. But the group that Sarah and I are in keeps following AJ’s
instructions to do five push-ups every time one of us drops the ball.
Lemmings. Once it’s all over, I realize that I have learned a lot about my
weaknesses and very little about my strengths. One thing I will remember is
AJ telling us to “grab a quick sip” between exercises. That’s one command
I’ll take to heart. At the Monk. Tonight.

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