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Restaurant Reviews

Taste Test Thursday: Dill Pickles

There's nothing quite like the briny zing of a dill pickle. But which variety is the best?
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Dill Pickles, they’re versatile and delicious. You can slice them, fry them, stick them in a sandwich, or use their juice to chase down a shot of whiskey. There’s nothing quite like the briny zing of a dill pickle. But like most things, they come in a variety of shapes, colors and textures. There’s kosher, organic, spicy, sweet, garlic-infused, all of which flaunt the title “dill pickle.” For this week’s blind taste test, D Magazine staff tried a handful of store-bought spears. Here’s what they thought.

The pickles:
A. Mt. Olive
B. McClure’s
C. Vlasic
D. Farmer’s Garden by Vlasic
E. Rick’s Picks

Tasting notes:

Mt. Olive pickle. Photo by Catherine Downes.
Mt. Olive pickle. Photo by Catherine Downes.

Mt. Olive

  • Kinda wimpy.
  • Soft, a little squishy, not a huge after-taste. Very green.
  • Typical pickle.
  • Mild sourness, like a prop in a ’50s sitcom. This is a pickle for a picnicking couple, one that doesn’t yet know itself well enough to bicker.
  • Kind of floppy, flimsy pickle. The taste is OK but it’s not my favorite.
  • Vlassic? Fine.
  • A little mushy texture, but nice zing to the flavor.
  • Too limp.

 

McClure's pickle. Photo by Catherine Downes.
McClure’s pickle. Photo by Catherine Downes.

McClure’s

  • Wow, that one punched me in the tongue! I didn’t expect the spice, but I think I liked it.
  • NO! Really spicy, in a bad way.
  • Kick ass pickle.
  • This could rival a peperoncini, but the weightiness of the pickle is only intensifying the already daredevil quality of its heat. This is a meal unto itself.
  • This is a pale pickle. Wowzer! It has a kick to it, I regret taking such a big bite.
  • Yikes. This is a surprise spicy pickle. No.
  • Big and fat. Way spicy.
  • Has a kick that creeps up on you. Too tart. Unenjoyable eating experience.

 

Vlasic pickle. Photo by Catherine Downes.
Vlasic pickle. Photo by Catherine Downes.

Vlasic

  • Reminds me of my childhood.
  • Very seedy and green. Mild.
  • What on this earth is this awful vinegar garden and who is responsible for this chemical atrocity?
  • Limp ass dill.
  • A bit too bright and possibly too juicy. Good taste. Solid Pickle.
  • This is a normal pickle. Very similar to A.
  • Tastes kind of dirty. Like dirt.
  • Overly pickled. Bet this is a mass-produced pickle.

 

 

Farmer's Garden by Vlasic. Photo by Catherine Downes.
Farmer’s Garden by Vlasic. Photo by Catherine Downes.

Farmer’s Garden by Vlasic

  • Mild, but great crunch. Kind of refreshing, actually.
  • Most crunchy, medium flavor.
  • Dill-icious.
  • Flimsy, lackluster. An anemia of flavor and an amnesia of barely-remembered pickle-hood.
  • Tastes like it came from my Mennonite relatives’ garden. Delicious.
  • Very crunchy! Not too vinegary. Good.
  • Very thin. Nice crunch but kind of bland.
  • Crunch! The way it’s supposed to be. Classic Kosher dilly.

 

 

Rick's Picks pickle. Photo by Catherine Downes.
Rick’s Picks pickle. Photo by Catherine Downes.

Rick’s Picks

  • Is that clove? That’s just wrong.
  • Disgusting. I don’t like it. I’m thirsty now.
  • Not your typical pickle. Overly-cloved.
  • Too sweet. Way too much like bread and butter (pickles). Gross.
  • “Does this have ginger in it?” I ask. “Cloves, ” says a colleague. “Are you supposed to tell me that?” He shrugs. He acts as if he did not just tell me that I took a frosted, artificially scented, holiday pine needle to impale the roof of my already-suffering mouth.
  • This is going to sound weird, but it tastes like a Christmas tree.
  • Tastes like a sweet pickle. Nice texture.
  • Perfect crispness. But is that clove that I taste? Not a true kosher dill.

 

Tally up:

Mt. Olive 2

McClure’s 1

Vlasic 0

Farmer’s Market by Vlasic 5

Rick’s Picks 0

 

The winner is:

Vlasic’s “artisan-quality” pickles dominated the taste test with five votes.

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