Forgive this hungry scribe. It’s all too often that prose fails a good dish, whether pedestrian or haute cuisine. And so, because Breaking Bad-themed bento boxes are so 2013, I offer you these SideDish Sonnets in the hope that they amuse and inspire you to dine wherever the muses may take you.
Bring forth to me half cook’d beef ground up fresh
I’ll ask you twice nay thrice for draught of wine
Yet e’en swanky booze cant help such a wretch
So fancy and dressed all up to the nines
Great buns on bartenders may not suffice
If the burger doesn’t cut the mustard
But nary a Golden Tee (my sweet vice)
Improves it much upon Dave and Busters
Crawfish pistols, frigid and tame
Sweet potatoes, fried coldest and old
All form and no function must be to blame
For turning this gold mine to fool’s gold
Location, location, you prattle on
It takes more (unless you’re a Cinnabon)
Steven Phelps is a Dallas-based writer and designer. You can find him on Twitter @stevenphelps.