Every year, right before the Rangers kick-off their season, the Ballpark comes up with outrageous new food items to trick us into buying their giant hotdogs and monstrous hamburgers.
And every year, we say no more. Please, no more.
Monday, March 31 is when the Rangers play their first game this spring. And the offerings are looking bigger (and better?) than ever. Here are a few of the rookies.
First up to bat: Bacon on a stick
We’re pretty sure this thing could whack a ball to Kingdom Come and back, given its enormity. We give this one two thumbs up.
Second up: Frozen beer
In honor of Yu Darvish, the Rangers are Asian-ing up their cups with some Japanese beer. Kirin is basically the Bud Light of the East.
Third to play: Choomongous
If you haven’t gotten newbie Shin-Soo Choo’s name tattooed on your chest yet, well, you can still show your support by eating a two-feet-long hot dog with spicy Asian beef (bulgogi, perhaps?). You can get all of that for $26. That’s cheaper than a tattoo.