Nothing to do With Food: The Pooper Scooper

Photography by John Gay.

I’m not posting this because the author sits beside me in the office, I am posting it because it occurred to me that many of you may not read our print product, D Magazine. This month, Krista Nightengale wrote a story about the PooPrints program. What is the PooPrints program? I’m glad you asked. The PooPrints program is designed for high-density residential areas such as condos and apartments. Here’s how it works:

All dogs and owners are interviewed when they sign leases. When a resident with a pet signs a lease, the dog’s cheek is swabbed. This sample is sent to the BioPet Vet Lab in Tennessee, which extracts the dog’s DNA and keeps it on file. When a waste sample is found [on premise], Welch [the manager] puts it in a container with enzymes, shakes until it’s the consistency of a “milkshake slurry,” and sends it to the lab. Within five days, the DNA is analyzed, and, with 99.9 percent certainty, the culprit is identified.

And fined. Big time. Krista shadows the manager when he confronts a guilty owner.