What’s Really in a Can of Whoopass?

Saturday night a few of us went to dinner at the new Knox-Henderson restaurant Horne & Dekker, where the tables centerpieces are a trio of house-labeled peas, carrots, and tomatoes. Kitschy. And useful: servers use the cans to serve the hot pizza pies. After dinner, on the way out the door, I spotted a different kind of can on a serving cart on the patio. A can of Whoopass. I blame the desserts for what happened then: the sugar high from a slice of coconut cream pie, peaches with caramel sauce and ice cream, and peanut butter buckeyes impaired my judgment, and I slipped this can of Whoopass in my purse. And then I couldn’t stop wondering, “What is really in a can of quality Whoopass?” We’re going to find out. But first, I want you to guess. It’s heavy. And it’s kind of sloshy but not too sloshy, not like peas or carrots.