The Food Stalkers: Sprinkles Cupcakes Sends Samples to D Magazine. Lots of Employees Eat Them.

D Magazine workers think Sprinkles are the breast.
D Magazine workers think Sprinkles are the breast.

Sprinkles Cupcakes sends dozens of cupcakes to this office all of the time. When the box arrives, our lovely and somewhat talent receptionist sends out a company- wide notice: “Yuckcakes in the kitchen!!! (Like BA:  always three, never four !!!’s.)

The arrival is preceded by an e-mail from Beth Hudson St. Lawrence at The Y Group. She includes a cheery note:  “Tuesday treats will arrive for you courtesy of  Sprinkles Cupcakes. Enjoy!”

I never enjoy them because every time—no exaggerations—I eat even half of one, I get stomach cramps. Several times I have asked Beth to stop the deliveries but she doesn’t listen.

Today we received the Summer Cherry cupcakes. Instead of the usual groans coming out of the kitchen, I heard oohs and aahs. “They’re different,” harked one voice I didn’t recognize (probably an intern). “Oh, I love this strawberry,” cooed another. So I marched in and made people taste them and then I polled the office for comments. Jump for a very scientific study of Sprinkles Cupcakes and the effects they have on the workers of D Magazine.

First off they are cherry cupcakes, not strawberry as noted by the young lady above. BTW, there is nobody in the office who knows who she is. (Beth?)

Nine workers from various departments ate cupcakes. Here is how they scored:

Love:  3
Like:  4
Dislike: 2

Here are comments:
“J. Rae’s in Fort Worth makes better ones.’

“There are so many cupcakes I like better than Sprinkles. They don’t excite me or repulse me.”

“I’m really tired of Spinkles, but I really like these [cherry].”

“I don’t love, like, or dislike them. I like-ish them.”

“Why do they always but that yucky tasting nipple on top?”

“When I see the e-mail that says they are in the kitchen I don’t jump out of my chair.”

“They are not my favorite but I eat them every time because they are free.”

“They give me a stomach ache.”