Set Aside Coupons For These Rides at the State Fair of Texas

I admit it. I was in over my head when I signed up to try to ride all 45 main rides in the Midway at the State Fair. Maybe I still felt like the 15-year-old who used to beg my mom for more coupons so I could check more spinning contraptions off my list. Maybe I forgot that I’m turning 30 next year and don’t bounce back the way I did before (which also applies to drinking wine).

At any rate, my memory was jogged quite harshly on Monday when I set out to ride as many rides as I could. I didn’t get far. But I did get sick, in a trash can next to the candy apples. I blame that partly on choosing the wrong ride to start out with, but I don’t want to make excuses.

After I got through 10 rides, beads of sweat oozing from my ashen face, I vowed to give them up altogether. But then again, I may forget this traumatic experience after I turn 30 and sign up to attempt 45 rides a second, foolish time. So there’s always next year.

For the 10 rides I managed to conquer—most of which were enjoyable, despite my inability to stomach a few—I’ve broken down the details and rated them from 1 to 5 corn dogs, with 5 being the best, so you know what’s worth your coupons and what’s not. Bon voyage!

1. Storm

Midway – north
12 coupons

This first and most nauseating ride is what did me in for the rest of the afternoon. A larger platform spins around continuously while the individual cars on the platform spin simultaneously. It is inception spinning. I rode alongside screaming children, which didn’t help. It did nothing but spin in the same direction. My stomach crept up to my throat and never left. And I never really recovered.

2. Swings

Midway – west
12 coupons

This ride didn’t have a formal name on it, but everyone knows what the swings are. It is a classic fair attraction and is fun for everyone. I enjoyed the nice breeze after the Storm, although I was still reeling.

3. Texas Skyway

Midway – southwest, by Big Tex
14 coupons (one way)

Sitting in the Skyway car was a nice respite from the turbulence on the ground. It was more transportation than ride, but I recommend it if you feel ill from spinning. A solid view and experience for fair first-timers.

4. Texas Star

Midway – southwest
20 coupons

The Fair wouldn’t be what it is without its most recognized feature – the Texas Star. It requires a healthy dose of coupons, but I think everyone should ride it once for the skyline view and the nostalgia. After that, the long line isn’t worth it.

5. Top o’ Texas Tower

Midway – south
14 coupons

I had never gone up the tower before and wondered why not after I set foot in the gloriously air-conditioned cabin. It spun slowly as it went up and then down, providing killer 360-degree views of the city. If nothing else, it was a lovely break from the heat.

6. Haunted Castle

Midway – south
12 coupons

This was just a very, very slow roller coaster through a vaguely haunted house. Mummies and dead people popped out at me, but it was not scary, which says a lot coming from someone who gets creeped out by haunted houses. Mostly, it was just hot inside.

7. Skyscraper

Midway – south
70 coupons

I was feeling a little better and decided to launch myself 165 feet in the air because I love heights and apparently lack common sense. It was probably not the best idea considering my state at the time, but in spite of that I had a blast. It costs a bundle, so I recommend doing this once every few years.

8. Iron Dragon

Midway – southeast
12 coupons

I really felt every twist and turn in Iron Dragon, a roller coaster that could at times be pretty rickety. This is a good ride for folks who like neither heights nor spinning, but it wasn’t super exciting.