The Year of Living Frugally

Dear Friends,

I’m sure a lot of you didn’t think I’d have time to write my holiday newsletter this year, what with the devastating election (as you know, Cindy is a dear friend), Worth getting demoted at Goldman Sachs, the subsequent SEC investigation, and the freezing of our assets. In the words of my friend Mother Teresa, “These are trying times.” (I’m sure you all remember when I spent some time with her while browsing for children in Calcutta.) You’ve all been so gracious in giving us our space—not calling and asking a hundred questions, respecting our privacy and not sending us invitations, allowing us solitude at the club—that it only seemed right that I make time to write you all and tell you not to worry on our account. Everyone knows that bad things do not happen to good people, so this will not keep us down for long!

First up, my husband Worth. Throughout all of this injustice, he has managed to maintain his sense of humor. He teases me that I might have to put my education to use and find a job. I tease him right back and tell him that I might use that education to find the best divorce attorney in the city! Not everyone can laugh like we do after 10 years of marriage. As many of you from book club (I miss you, girls!!) know, I planned to buy Worth the President watch from Rolex (from $27,000 at Bachendorf’s) for two reasons. First, I had high hopes for his ascension at Goldman, and, second, it’s the model our friend Roger Federer favors, too. (You’ll all remember we sat with him in first class when we traveled to Dubai a few years ago.) That’s of course out of the question now. As you can imagine, Worth has been very introspective lately—reading the Bible and watching television—and he rarely gets dressed on his days off, so I considered a cashmere bathrobe in navy ($950 at Neiman Marcus). But that’s money better spent on the various charities we support and legal fees. Instead, I went with a nice pair of Sperry deerskin house shoes ($170 at Culwell & Son) that he can throw on when he needs to make a run to the liquor store.

As you girls from Cattle Baron’s know, I had my concerns about Worth’s secretary, Julia. You’ll be happy to learn that her necklines appear to have an inverse relationship with Worth’s fortunes; as the latter have plunged, the former have risen. She now wears turtlenecks to work and sits in a chair (as opposed to Worth’s lap!), so our prayer chain worked! Worth and I actually had a bit of a fight when I overheard him telling Julia he wanted to buy her a condo at the W (from $425,000, 214-303-5535, victoryresidences.com) as a Christmas bonus. When I confronted him about it, he called me selfish. I won’t belabor you with the details. Anyway, as cash has become a little less available, I offered that an Hermès scarf ($295 at Hermès) might be more suitable, and it would complement her turtlenecks nicely. But he scoffed at the notion. In the end, I agreed with him—$300 is a hair appointment, after all—and we settled on a mother-of-pearl picture frame ($65 at Mecox Gardens). Since she’s spending more time at her desk, she can use it to showcase her adorable sons (two different fathers). Family is so important in these times, is it not?

My stepdaughter Lisa is having some difficulties adjusting to our belt-tightening. As many of you know, she’s at The Spence School, in New York City (where Gwyneth Paltrow and Katie Couric matriculated). What you might not know: we’ve had to look into a work-study program to help with the exorbitant tuition. The adjustment hasn’t been easy on her, but once again a sense of humor helps. She has taken to calling me “Mommie Dearest,” which is a real hoot! I’ve explained to her that Christina Crawford was forced to work in the stables, which is much worse than the cafeteria. Originally, Worth and I planned to get her a fabulous trunk (from $17,330 at Bottega Veneta) for camp. I don’t have to tell any of you that summer camp can get so competitive—Waldemar is no exception—and the Worthingtons play to win. But Waldemar might not be in the cards for us this year. (Good news for all of you who have languished on the waiting list for so long!) Lisa asked for the Giant Part Time Bag by Balenciaga ($1,645 at Barneys New York), and I went to look at it. Unfortunately for Lisa, I ended up loving it, too, and we can’t both have the same handbag! So, I did what I always do when I’m in a bind: I called up my dear friend Renée Rouleau and scheduled a synergy 3 facial ($325 at Renée Rouleau) for Lisa while she’s home for the break. She’ll thank me later—bad skin paired with dishpan hands do not make for good marriage material.

Our little pride and joy, Worthy Jr., just turned 7, and we still have high hopes that he will become a Marksman like his dad. Though they are insisting that he learn to read before they will even consider him, which is an outrage. First of all, those Worthington-donated buildings did not build themselves, and, second, all children do not learn at the same pace. Which reminds me: I’d like to assure everyone that we’ve gotten the message about Worthy’s behavior on the playground, and our nanny Rosa is doing everything she can to work with that little man on his biting problem—especially after the lawsuit. You all know how I adore my little prince, and I wanted to get him something special this year, what with all the turmoil. I considered getting him another custom tree house (from $1,400 at Prairie House Playhouses and Lookout Forts, 972-686-7011), but Worthy’s therapist doesn’t think he should be rewarded for burning down the first one. I think at heart, my son is an artist, which is why we thought about getting him a Panasonic digital camcorder in blue ($199 at Best Buy), but, once again, my husband stepped in and said no. This year, he’ll have to settle for becoming the next Jackson Pollock rather than Sydney Pollack. We bought him a Winton complete oil painting set ($44.95 at Asel Art). I can’t wait for him to become famous. Then St. Mark’s will be sorry!

As it turns out, with so few social engagements, I have become one heck of a tennis player. I credit that to Sam—who is not only an incredible tennis pro, but also a deeply spiritual person. Look beyond that tan, perfect body, and you will find the kindest, funniest man you’ve ever met. He has become such a close friend, and this year I wanted to buy him something special. Sam sweats a lot—it’s what he does for a living—so I bought him Calycantus by Acqua di Colonia, a masculine, spicy scent ($110 at LAFCO New York). He can think about his best friend (me!) every time he applies it to his lean, adorable frame. The poor dear is always in tennis clothes, but sometimes I’d like to meet for nice dinners, as friends do. I ordered him a couple of custom shirts (from $120 at Q Shirtmakers).

We had quite a laugh while I took his measurements! Once you have shirts, you have to get cuff links by Lolly Harrison, so I called my good friend (and housewares manager) Donald Fowler and insisted that he advise me on whether to get silver or gold ($1,450 for silver at Stanley Korshak). I can’t wait to help Sam get dressed up.

Anyway, I’ve prattled on long enough. We’re off to Aspen for New Year’s. In the spirit of sacrifice, we’re flying commercial. But please do let’s get together soon. God bless.

— THE WORTHINGTONS
Worth, Georgette, Lisa, and little Worthy