Why We Live Here
Dallas is flat and ugly. It tries too hard to be an international city. The summers are insufferable. The people are all rednecks. So why do we live here? Here are 59 reasons.
1. The most beautiful women in the world
2. 207 days of convertible weather
3. The view of downtown from the 15th green at Stevens Park
4. Doak Walker
5. Turtle Creek Boulevard
6. The speed limit on the Tollway
7. Roger Staubach threw the first “Hail Mary” to Drew Pearson
8. Passing the tip jar at Adair’s
9. Michael Irvin’s mink
10. White Rock Lake
11. Tobogganing in a quarter inch of wet snow on Flagpole Hill
12. Being able to park
13. Cowboy boots at any occasion
14. Jazz Under the Stars
15. Tokalon Drive
16. Last Call at Neiman’s
17. The Dixie Chicks
18. Super Bowls VI, XII, XXVII, XXVIII, XXX
19. A grilled cheese and chocolate shake at Highland Park Pharmacy
20. The 1936 Texas Centennial Exposition
21. Deep Ellum
22. Holiday lights in Highland Park
23. The Greenville Avenue St. Paddy’s Day Parade
24. Robocop used City Hall as the police HQ of the future
25. Debbie did us
26. Our founder, John Neely Bryan, thought he killed a man and died in an insane asylum
27. The calf scramble at the Mesquite Rodeo
28. We invented the shopping mall
29. We invented the frozen margarita
30. We invented the microchip
31. We shot J.R.
32. “Howdy” is an acceptable greeting
33. H. Ross Perot’s ears
34. Bonnie and Clyde
35. The Cattle Baron’s Ball
36. The 4,535 pipes of the Lay Family Organ
37. The Nasher Sculpture Center is coming
38. Mark Cuban’s goofy enthusiasm, Jerry Jones’ Machiavellian enthusiasm, and Tom Hicks’ waning enthusiasm
39. Mary Kay’s pink Cadillacs
40. Tamales at Herrera’s with a brown-bagged six pack
41. The back room of the Lounge at the Inwood Theatre
42. We created both Barney and Doom
43. Preston Trails is still men-only
44. Fletcher’s Corny Dogs at the State Fair
45. The Katy Trail
46. It’s a three-hour flight to either coast
47. A failed oilman and baseball team co-owner can become president
48. Friday-night high school football
49. Winter clothes go on end-of- season sales just when we need them
50. The Free Advice Guys at White Rock
51. The Trinity River (hopefully)
52. Half Price Books
53. Strip clubs
54. WRR, the oldest radio station in Texas
55. Sam Moon
56. Mick Jagger married one of us
57. T.D. Jakes moved here
58. The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders
59. We’re not Houston
