Yesterday, I told you about how hot our office has gotten without AC. In the comments to that post, Nancy revealed that the heat was especially hard for her to take, given that she has a UTI. That’s the background information you need to adjudicate the following bet that Nancy and I just made:
It’s still hot in here, by the way. Building management said the AC was fixed; it’s not. So we are all sitting around, sweating, trying to avoid doing actual work, irritating the hell out of Zac. A guy named Matt (further identification not warranted) wanders over and sits down by my desk. He helps himself to some leftover Pecan Lodge beef ribs that Nancy brought back from lunch. He makes several bad suggestions about future podcast guests. And then, for a reason I can’t recall because the heat is now affecting my memory and not just my armpits, I say something about Nancy’s UTI.
“He doesn’t even know what a UTI is,” Nancy says, indicating Matt. I’m not sure why she thought Matt wouldn’t know what a UTI is. Perhaps because Matt went to St. Mark’s. I don’t know.
“He does, too,” I say, even though I know he went to St. Mark’s.
“Does not.”
“Does, too,” I say. “I’ll bet you a hundred bucks he knows what a UTI is.”
“You’re on,” Nancy says.
There follows much hubbubbing as co-workers take interest in such a large bet. It is established that, yes, this is a real bet. Not wanting to take $100 from Nancy, who was kind enough to bring back from lunch a Pecan Lodge beef rib, I suggest we lower the bet to $20. It is agreed.
“Matt,” I say, “what is a UTI?”
He says, “Is it the University of Texas at Irving?”
A good laugh is had by all. Matt pats himself on the back and then he says, with confidence, “It’s a urinary tract infection.”
Here’s where you come in. Nancy claims that she didn’t lose the bet, because if this had been Jeopardy!, Matt would not have been allowed to give a second answer. I point out that this is not Jeopardy! It is D Magazine. Matt clearly knows what a UTI is, and that was the bet.
So which is it?
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UPDATE (4:17P) This is like the Brexit vote. It actually should never have been put to a vote. And it only demonstrates that democracy is a flawed concept. The people can’t be trusted to govern themselves. Or settle UTI bets.
