I have anticipated your questions about this installment of the Great Tuxedo Challenge of 2012, and I will answer them in the order that they popped into your sweet little noggin.
— Cypress Springs. Buddy of mine by the name of Mark Laske has a house out there.
— No. We went skiing around noon, which I thought was a little early to be drinking Patron XO Cafe. To me, Patron XO Cafe is more of an evening drink, perhaps an aprÃ©s-dinner cocktail thing.
— Yeah, the entire weekend, except for one hour of exercise on Saturday (swimming) and, of course, after 8:45 p.m. And that includes when we rebuilt his boat deck on Saturday.
— No, I brought two tuxes with me. The fine folks from Al’s Formal Wear — the same fine folks who will be only too happy to help you with all your formal wear needs — gave me a “stunt tuxedo” for water skiing, with the understanding that it might not be returned in tip-top condition (or even returned at all). Though the tux looks black in this photograph, it was actually brown. And pin-striped. And surprisingly heavy when it got wet.
— Yes. But you can’t see it (or the studs) because I’m wearing a black life vest under my coat. Safety first and all. The cummerbund and tie fared better in the water than I figured they would. I’m wearing them as I type this.
— No. In fact, I can’t recall the last time I skied. I’m not very good at it, either, so it took me three tries to get up. Partly, too, I think that’s because the suit created so much more drag. I probably only stayed up for two or three minutes before I bailed.
— Yeah, we passed one boat close enough that I could see the befuddled expressions on the faces of those onboard. I bravely mustered enough strength to wave at them, which I think they appreciated.
— No, no. Soon as I got back in the boat, we headed for home, and I changed into a dry tuxedo.
— David Heidle. He’s good, right? He brought a big ol’ lens with him.