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How-To

How Not To Get Out Of a Ticket

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Yesterday, while coming back to the office, I was pulled over for turning right at a red light where, apparently, there are two signs prohibiting that. The officer was on a motorcycle. As the officer was approaching my car, I caught a quick glimpse in my rearview. Probably too quick, since the first thing I said was, “Sorry, ma’am.” To the male officer. Anyway, I guess the real point of this is don’t turn right on red at the intersection of Ross and the frontage road of 75. And just say, “Sorry, officer,” if you do. Or say nothing. Yes, say nothing. Or just repeat the Jay-Z parts from the second verse of this.

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